It’s totally my pleasure to have Sh!’s fabulous manager, and my very good friend, Renee back on a Hopeful Romantic. It’s always fun to have her here, and today Renee is going to give us a quick primer on bondage for beginners. Welcome, Renee!
After the smash hit of Fifty Shades of Grey, we’ve noticed a massive increase in couples curious about kinky sex and BDSM (Bondage, Domination, Sadism, Masochism), so I was delighted when KD invited me to share tips on bondage for beginners.
There are a few basic rules to kinky play and it’s important you know about these before tying your willing partner to the nearest bed post.
Following these simple rules can save an embarrassing trip to A&E:
plan for all eventualities – keep keys to cuffs (or medical scissors, if you use rope or tape) nearby.
Use a safeword and never leave your captive alone. A safeword is a word that lets the Top (the person doing the tying) know that the Bottom (the person being tied up) has had enough. Agree on a word that you wouldn’t normally use during sex, and honor it absolutely.
Green = Yes!
Amber = Slow Down
Red = STOP!
Next – on to the fun stuff!
A roll of bondage tape is a great starter tool, not only do you get several meters of shiny tape to wrap round your submissive, but it can be rolled back up when play time is over. The tape sticks to itself rather than to soft skin, so it won’t hurt when peeled off at the end of a session. Use the tape to tie wrists, or as a blind fold, or why not make a boob tube!
Soft rope cuffs are great for newbies, and they’re available at a price that won’t break the bank. Simply slip onto your partner, and wahey you go!
Satin ties look and feel gorgeous, and can be tied to pretty much anything: bedposts, chairs or even a sturdy kitcken table for a splayed-out effect. The last one is particularly useful if you want to tease and torment your delicious slave for any length of time.
The Bondage Bow is an excellent piece of kit to include in your toy box. Several inches of stretchy latex can be wound round wrists or ankles – just remember to have medical scissors handy to avoid sticky situations.
Handcuffs are quick and easy, both to get hold of and to use. There are dozens of cheap chrome cuffs out on the market, but I’d advise against using these as they’ll chafe on delicate skin. Instead, opt for luxury lined cuffs for comfort and style. They’ll cost a little extra, but unmarked skin is well worth the additional pounds. You can easily attach chains or rope to the cuffs, both available at B&Q – your friendly neighbourhood go-to shop for kink in the suburbs.
If you’re in a particularly mean mood, tie one wrist to one ankle and create an undignified hobble-effect that will please the harshest of Mistresses. Position your captive somewhere they’ll be comfortable. Ensure the room is warm, and you could turn up the sexy by lighting some scented massage candles. Once the wax has begun to melt, dip your fingers in the warm oil and take some time to indulge your lover with slow luxurious strokes.
At this point, a little sucking and kissing on the neck also works well. (Tease, tease, tease…) By applying a gentle vibrator over nipples and labia you are bound to have your captive squirming and begging for more in no time. (It’s entirely up to you if you give it to them or not..!)
Personally, I’m very fond of vibrating nipple clamps – but attached to labia rather than nipples for a crazy, all-buzzin’ effect. Add a finger or tongue, and your partner may well gush all over your freshly laundered sheets..!
It’s entirely up to you and your play partner as to how long the tie-up-&-tease session should go on, but do make sure that your sub isn’t getting cold. If hands and feet are feeling chilly, it’s time to untie and cuddle…
Renee is the Senior Store Manager at female-focused erotic boutique Sh! Women’s Erotic Emporium in Hoxton Square. She has her fingers in many pies and spends her days talking about G-spots, P-spots and any other spots you may have found in your nether regions. When she is not selling sex toys to the women & couples of London, she can be found at home with a thrilling book and a glass of pink wine, surrounded by her beloved bunnies (of the furry variety).
Follow the Sh! Girlz for all the latest fun & frolics: Twitter: @ShWomenstore Facebook: Sh! Hoxton Website: http://www.sh-womenstore.com/