Category Archives: Guest Blogger

It’s Another Cup of Christmas! by Jenny Kane

Guest Blogger, , , , , ,

It’s a pleasure to have the romance writer, Jenny Kane, over at mine today. Most of you know her as erotica writer, Kay Jaybee, but our lovely Kay has a much softer side, which manifests as her alter-ego, Jenny Kane, who just happens to be in the Christmas Spirit! Welcome, Jenny!

Thank you so much K D for letting me come and visit your wonderful web site again!

Another Cup of ChristmasToday I’m in festive mood with news of the novella length sequel to my first novel, Another Cup of Coffee, (a Kindle best seller!) – Another Cup of Christmas!

My second outing as Jenny Kane is, like its predecessor, set in and around Pickwicks Coffee House in Richmond (on the outskirts of London). Five years have elapsed since the close of Another Cup of Coffee, and there are a few new faces to be spotted amongst the old.

Although Another Cup of Christmas follows on from Another Cup of Coffee, it can also be read as a standalone piece…

Here’s the Blurb-

Five years ago the staff of Pickwicks Cafe in Richmond were thrown into turmoil when their cook and part-owner, Scott, had a terrible accident. With help from his friends, his wife Peggy, and the staff at the local hospital, he made an amazing recovery. Now Pickwicks is preparing to host a special Christmas fundraiser for the hospital department that looked after Scott.

Pickwicks’ waitress Megan has been liaising with the ward’s administrator, Nick, as all the staff who helped Scott’s recovery are invited are invited. As the problems of organising the fundraiser take up more and more of their busy lives, Megan and Nick contact each other more frequently, and their emails and phone calls start to develop from the practical into the flirty.

But can you actually fall for someone you’ve never met?

As the fundraiser draws closer, Megan is beginning to think that she had imagined all the virtual flirting between herself and Nick – he promised to arrange to meet her for real, but he hasn’t done so. Now he’s bringing someone with him to the fundraiser, and they’re just bound to be everything Megan feels she isn’t …

Only short- Another Cup of Christmas can be easily consumed in one delicious cinnamon flavoured mouthful! I would recommend a quiet afternoon curled up on the sofa with a mince pie and a hot drink to hand (a cup of coffee perhaps??), and an hour’s escape into the adventures of Peggy, Scott, Kit, Phil, Nick and Megan…

Here’s how Another Cup of Christmas begins…

Chapter One

December 4th 2012

Having politely escaped her third ‘So what are you doing for Christmas?’ conversation of the day, Megan Johnson was retreating back to the counter when she spotted Pickwicks’ most regular customer sit up from her work and brush a stray red hair from her eyes.

Knowing it had been at least half an hour since Kit’s caffeine addiction had been attended to, the waitress swiped up the percolator jug and headed in her direction.

Without bothering to ask if it was required, Megan poured the steaming liquid with practised care, before taking advantage of the lull in Christmas shopping trade, and sitting down opposite her friend. ‘Going OK?’

Swivelling the laptop round to face Megan, Kit rubbed the back of her neck, ‘I’m sure I’ve missed something. What do you think?’

 

Pickwicks Festive Fundraiser!

Spoil Yourself With An Afternoon of Pickwicks’ Finest Festive Fare.

 In Aid of the Royal Free Hospital’s Spinal Ward.

Saturday 22nd December from 2pm.

Deluxe Buffet And Festive Fundraising Fun!

Tickets are ONLY £25 per person

Don’t miss out!

Book your place at Pickwicks Coffee Shop, Richmond – NOW!!

 

Megan scanned the poster. ‘Oh, that’s fabulous! I thought you were writing your latest novel.’

‘To tell you the truth, that’s exactly what I should be doing, but Peggy asked me to do some publicity for the fundraiser and I thought I’d better get on with it. Time seems to be dissolving. It’ll be the 22nd before we know it.’

‘I know what you mean.’ Megan started to collect the dishes left by a couple who’d just vacated a nearby table. ‘The next three weeks are going to fly by.’

‘Two and a half weeks!’

‘Oh, hell! Really?’

‘That’s why I want to get these done; otherwise everyone will be too booked up with their own celebrations to have time to come.’ Gesturing towards the kitchen, Kit asked, ‘How’s Scott doing out there, or shouldn’t I ask?’

Megan’s permanent smile widened further across her lightly freckled face. ‘He’s amazing. I have no idea how he does it. The temperature in that kitchen is tropical, and yet Scott’s still beaming that massive toothy grin of his. I’m seriously beginning to think he is physically unable to stop cooking! Surely he must have pre-prepared as much as he can for the fundraiser by now?’

Kit nodded. ‘He probably has, but Peggy is getting paranoid there won’t be enough food.’ Glancing around, checking that Megan wasn’t needed by a customer for a moment, Kit pointed to a fresh pile of abandoned cups. ‘If I clear those, will you have a proper read of the poster? I’m sure I’ve missed something obvious but I can’t put my finger on it?’

Kit was already standing up and taking a tray from Megan’s hands before the waitress said, ‘On one condition.’

‘Which is?’

‘I can check my emails? I’m supposed to be liaising with the hospital about this for Peggy, but we’ve been so busy over the last few days I haven’t had time to see if Nick has got back to me about how many of the ward staff are coming.’

‘Nick?’

Megan silently cursed her inability to prevent the involuntary warm pink blush that hit her pale cheeks, ‘Yeah, he’s the admin guy for the ward that cared for Scott after his accident.’

‘Nice, is he?’ Kit gently teased the petite blonde waitress, wondering, not for the first time, why someone as kind and pretty as Megan hadn’t been snapped up years ago.

‘I’ve never met him, but he seems friendly. Well, he does via email and over the phone at least.’

‘You’ve spoken to him then?’

‘There are loads of things to sort out.’ Megan, knowing that the crush she’d developed on Nick’s Irish accent was utterly ridiculous, turned her full attention to the poster on the screen before her…

****

I hope that’s whetted your appetite for this feel good festive romance!

If you’d like to buy Another Cup of Christmas it is available as a downloads from all good eBook suppliers including-

Amazon UK
Amazon US

Thanks again for letting me come a share a little of my latest creation with you today K D,

Happy reading everyone,

Jenny xx

 

Another Cup of CoffeeBio-

Jenny Kane is the author of the best selling contemporary romance Another Cup of Coffee (Accent Press, 2013), and its novella length sequel Another Cup of Christmas (Accent Press, 2013)

Jenny’s second full length novel is already in the pipeline… Keep your eye on her blog at www.jennykane.co.uk for more details.

Twitter- @JennyKaneAuthor

 

Jenny also writes as the erotica author Kay Jaybee.

As Kay she has written over 85 stories including The Retreat, (Xcite 2013), The Voyeur, (Xcite 2012), Making Him Wait(Sweetmeats, 2012), The Perfect Submissive (Xcite, 2012),Digging Deep, A Sticky Situation (Xcite 2012), and The Collector(Austin & Macauley, 2012).

Details of all Kay’s work can be found at www.kayjaybee.me.uk

Tamsin Flowers’ The Christmas Tattoo – Awash with the Seasonal Feel-Good Factor

Guest Blogger, , , , , , , , ,

The Christmas TattooThere’s something about Christmas that gets to me. For 11 months of the year, I’m probably the least sentimental person you’ll meet and then, for the month of December, I transform into something soggy, sniveling and over-sentimental. Sit me down in front of Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye singing ‘We’ll follow the old man’ in White Christmas and I’m gone. James Stewart in It’s A Wonderful Life – pass the tissues! Show me a John Lewis Christmas ad and I’m welling up. It doesn’t take much.

So around Christmas, I like to read something with the feel-good factor. This is the time of year for happy endings – the snow falls in White Christmas; George Bailey is reunited with his family in It’s A Wonderful Life and the bear wakes up for Christmas Day in the commercial. Oops – just thinking about it is enough to make my eyes tear up. And I want the same from a book if I’m reading it December.

Anyway, when I decided to write a Christmas erotic romance, I wanted to capture some of that feel-good emotion that makes Christmas what it is. Of course, it’s not all plain sailing and my two main characters have plenty of obstacles standing in the way of true love – a curmudgeon of a father, an ex boyfriend who reappears, a pregnant business partner, jealousy, tears and fights. But I don’t think it’s too much of spoiler to give away that The Christmas Tattoo has a happy ending.

After all, I couldn’t do otherwise at this time of year, could I?

Tamsin

xxx

 

The Christmas Tattoo – blurb

When sexy red-head Bradie Clements comes home from Washington to nurse a broken heart and build bridges with her estranged father, she’s certainly not on the lookout for romance. After catching her boyfriend Kris in bed with her best friend and boss, all she wants to do is run and hide. But a chance encounter with local tattoo artist Colton Bassett leads to an unexpected appointment with his needle. Even though it’s cold outside, the temperature rises to boiling point as the two discover an irresistible attraction. But then Kris arrives on the scene to claim her back in time for his family Christmas and Bradie starts to remember what she saw in him. Tormented by jealousy and suspicion over Colton’s pregnant business partner, Bradie starts to wonder if her new romance is over before it’s begun…

 

Buy links

Available at Amazon.com, Amazon UK, Kobo, and Xcite Books.

 

Excerpt

Colt Bassett’s legs turned to water as he bent in low enough for his lips to brush against Bradie’s.  He’d kissed those lips once before, briefly, and he’d never forgotten how they’d tasted.  He’d dreamt of kissing them again a million times and now, when he thought the flame he’d been carrying for her for over a decade had at last gone out, she’d walked back into his life. Right into his studio, asking for a tattoo.  Her eyes asking for a kiss.

His lips brushed hers, tentative at first.  He’d made mistakes with her before but he knew he was reading the signals right this time; a decade of experience had taught him what to look for.  Her pupils were dilated, her lips parted and a little moist.  Her breathing uneven.  He put a hand along her jaw to hold her still as his mouth moved over hers and he sensed the subtle arching of her back and tilting of her head to give him better access.

Her kiss tasted immediately familiar, her lips as soft and yielding as he remembered.  He swallowed and wondered whether he dared plunge his tongue into her mouth.  The thought of it sent a spasm of lust up through his cock, had his heart pounding against his chest and his balls throbbing in his shorts.  He knew he was reaching the point of no return; either draw back or take things forward.  He tried to read Bradie’s expression but her eyes were shut.  When her hand snaked up around the back of his neck, he recognized an invitation to continue, so he slowly traced the line of her lips with the tip of his tongue.

She rewarded him with a soft mewl from deep within her throat; she wanted this as much as he did.  Her mouth opened and then her tongue pressed against his, pushing into his mouth and intensifying his need to take things further.  She tasted of sweet coffee and he pushed back against her to find his way into her mouth; their tongues slipping past each other to explore at leisure.  Her back arched more and he gripped the back of her neck to pull her in against him.  Soft breasts touched his chest as her jacket fell open; he could feel her nipples pebbling hard through the thin fabric of her blouse.  He raised his other hand and brought it up to the side of her breast…

A bell rang.  A door slammed.

Fuck!  Someone had come into the shop.

“Colt?  Are you back there?”

Shit, Saskia! 

 

Tamsin FlowersTamsin Flowers

Tamsin Flowers loves to write light-hearted erotica, often with a twist in the tail/tale and a sense of fun.  In the words of one reviewer, ‘Ms Flowers has a way of describing sexual tension that forces itself upon your own body.’ Her stories have appeared in a wide variety of anthologies and she is now graduating to novellas, for publishers including Cleis Press, Xcite Books, Secret Cravings and Totally Bound. This year, she entered NaNoWriMo, with the intention of penning her magnum opus in the very near future.  In the meantime, like most erotica writers, she finds herself working on at least ten stories at once: while she figures out whose leg belongs in which story, you can find out more about her at Tamsin’s Superotica or Tamsin Flowers.

Kay Jaybee is Kinking Up Christmas!

Guest Blogger, , , , , ,

It’s always a pleasure to have my dear friend and fab writer, Kay Jaybee over, and nobody does Christmas quite like Kay does. Kay, get us into the kinky Christmas spirit!

 

I love writing Christmas stories. There is something about playing with tinsel, spices and the office Christmas party that brings out the kinkster in me…

Christmas KinkChristmas Kink is a collection of five erotic stories penned especially for the festive season.

Blurb-

What’s your favourite part of the Christmas celebration? Decorating the tree with tinsel, the heavenly aroma of cinnamon and fruit from Christmas cakes and puddings, the office Christmas party, a visit to Santa’s grotto, the presents?

Kay Jaybee’s Christmas Kink twists all of these festive traditions into five individual episodes of hot erotica that will leave you fanning yourself with the nearest Christmas card…

Over the past 9 years I’ve written an annual Christmas story- and this year I decided (with a lot of help from my friends) to self publish a few of my past seasonal tales, plus a brand new one- The Little Red Dress.

Romantic, steamy, with a touch of S&M, and a sprinkling of cinnamon (yes, really) – I hope I’ve managed to add a little Christmas kink into this anthology for everyone…

Here’s a little taster…

Santa’s Little Helper

Jay gazed approvingly at her reflection in the tinsel decorated mirror. The gold material shimmered as she turned from side-to-side. Cut to fit tightly against her chest, the bodice section gave way to an extremely short, almost tutu style skirt, of the finest silvery gauze.

Her fingers trailed through the soft folds before she reached around to stroke the feather like wings that protruded from her back.

The fabric curtain was drawn back and the sales assistant drew breath. ‘You are possibly the most beautiful fairy ever destined to top a Christmas tree.’ He pulled the ties tighter at the back of the bodice, forcing Jay to stand up taller. ‘You are also the sexiest.’ He pushed two exquisite high-heeled shoes towards her white stocking clad feet, enjoying the view as her tiny gold thong flashed in front of his eyes when she bent slightly to slip them on.

As a final touch he slid a delicate glittering tiara onto her short curled hair, and put a wand in her hand. ‘Now, all that’s missing is a smile.’

‘I am smiling.’

‘That’s not a smile, that’s the evil grin of a wicked slut who knows that every guy that claps eyes on you is going to be asking Santa Claus if he can screw you for Christmas.’

Jay laughed.

‘I was thinking you could go for the child friendly smile. After all, you’re supposed to be Santa’s Little Helper at one of the department stores right?’

Jay nodded, and tried to wipe the lust off her face. Not easy when she felt so damn horny dressed like an expensive tree decoration. She thanked the assistant, paid the costume hire charge and, wrapping a large black cloak around her shoulders, left the shop for her place of work.

The shop assistant had been right, she was to be Santa’s Little Helper, but this was not a grotto for children; his joke had been closer to the truth than he’d thought. As Jay reached ‘Spanks’, the club she’d worked in for two years, she slipped into one of the back rooms, and into the discreetly advertised grotto.

Santa, already dressed in his traditional red and white, with huge false beard and hat in place, stared at her with giveaway young eyes as she hung up her cloak. He didn’t say anything, but slipped a gloved hand up her skirt and slowly stroked the tops of her legs. Jay purred at him, enjoying the sensations for a few seconds before moving away.

It was show time.

The queue was fairly small, but as visits to Santa had been by appointment only, this was not a surprise.

After the first five men had sat on Santa’s lap and asked to have their Christmas wishes granted, for which they had already paid handsomely, Jay was glad to have a break. She needed a drink to remove the taste of condom and sweat from the three blow jobs she’d given, and needed to calm her own rising desire after the last two guys activities.

They had visited Santa together, sitting on a knee each, they’d requested an intimate examination of her chest. Santa had obliged, removed his gloves and undid her bodice, revealing her bare tits. The visitors fell on a breast each, both using their given five minutes to gorge on her, and feel up as much of her body as they could.

Jay knew that she had at least four more customers to grant wishes to before she could even think about her own satisfaction, but her tits, now firmly secured back behind the gold fabric, nagged at her for more attention, and she knew that she was far more tuned on than was professional.

Santa stuck his head around the door. ‘Five minutes honey.’

She nodded and took another sip of water.

He paused, ‘Do you think you’ll make it? I’ve never seen you so horny, I can practically smell you?’

‘Shit, it’s this outfit. I’ll be fine.’

‘We have a little time. I could help.’

‘Santa, what do you mean?’ Jay adopted a little girl voice and fluttered her eyelashes provocatively.

‘I mean, my dear little fairy, that it’s time you had a quick turn on my knee.’

****

If you’d like to see what Santa did next, or you fancy dipping into the other stories- Decorations, Cake Mix, Candy at Christmas or The Little Red Dress- you can buy Christmas Kink on Amazon at-

Amazon US
Amazon UK

Many thanks for letting me pop by today K D!

And an early Merry Christmas to you all!

Kay xx

 

Bio-

Kay Jaybee wrote the novels The Retreat (Xcite, 2013), Making Him Wait, (Sweetmeats Press, 2012), The Voyeur (Xcite, 2012), and The Perfect Submissive (Xcite 2012). She also write the novellas, Not Her Type (2nd ed. 1001 NightsPress, 2013), Digging Deep (Xcite, 2013), A Sticky Situation, (Xcite, 2012), and The Circus, (Sweetmeats Press), and the anthologies Christmas Kink (KDP, 2013) The Collector (Austin & Macauley, 2012), The Best of Kay Jaybee (Xcite, 2012), Tied to the Kitchen Sink, Equipment, (All Romance, 2012), Yes Ma’am (Xcite e-books, 2011), Quick Kink One and Two (Xcite e-books, 2010). Details of Kay’s work can be found at www.kayjaybee.me.uk

Why Just Anybody Can’t Write Sports Romance by Cassandra Carr

Guest Blogger, , , , , , , , ,

Underneath It AllThere’s the old adage – write what you know – and it’s true for sports romance. While there are many things a writer can fake, I think accurately portraying athletes, both off and on the playing surface, is far harder to get right.

I’m part of a group blog for sports romance and one of our writers recently posted on our internal Yahoo group that she’d read a hockey romance where a team won by two goals in overtime. If that writer truly knew hockey, or had taken the time to do even basic research, they would’ve known that overtime in hockey is sudden death – you can’t win by two goals.

Many other professions can be faked because policies and procedures are not the same across the board. An example of this are police procedurals. I live in the Western New York area and my Romance Writers of America chapter had a detective speak to us a couple of years ago. She mentioned that in Amherst, a suburb of Buffalo, interrogations are not recorded, whereas in the City of Buffalo they are. So as an author, you can use whatever works for your story and you’ll still be right, because there’s no one right way to do things.

But in sports, there usually is.

All football games have four 15-minute quarters. All hockey games have three 20-minute periods. Football fields are the same size. Hockey ice surfaces can differ somewhat depending on where the game is played, but overall there are the same lines, face off circles, etc no matter where the rink is located.

And what’s hardest of all to get right in sports romance is the behind-the-scenes stuff, whether it’s the locker room after a game or the athletes’ lives with their families. There’s a mystique surrounding many sports, so fans don’t often get glimpses into the athletes’ personal lives or what goes on inside a locker room. Only true fans of the game have any real accurate idea of the particulars in these areas.

As a reader of sports romance, what do you find the most annoying or think the most authors get wrong? Tell me in the comments!

Buy links:

Amazon UK
Amazon US
Barnes & Noble

Blurb:

Professional hockey player Rob D’Amico meets kindergarten teacher Alaina Rossa through a reading program for inner-city students.  When Rob observes the lack of even the basic supplies for their education, he takes it upon himself to get the students what they need.

Is it possible Alaina’s soul mate could be found in a world so different from her own? And for Rob, the last person he thought he’d find forever love with was an elementary school teacher.

Excerpt:

Alaina was aware the tone of her voice had moved beyond surprise and barreled right toward incredulous, but everything she thought she’d known about professional athletes and, in particular, this man, was being blown out of the water. If he’d really done this, just handing over his own money, and from what she could see, of his own volition, as the Storm didn’t appear to be involved, Rob was an entirely different person than she’d pegged him to be. A thread of guilt wound around her brain. Obviously she’d judged him prematurely, and now she felt like a bitch.

“Yes. Your students shouldn’t suffer because of their circumstances. And if the amount is not enough, tell me and I’ll give you more.”

“Not enough?” Her voice cracked on the last word. “Rob, this is…this is amazing. Truly.”

He shrugged again, rubbing the back of his neck, clearly uncomfortable with the praise.

After rising, she skirted her desk to stand in front of him. “Do you understand how much good this will do?”

Now Rob smiled, and Alaina noticed laugh lines around his eyes. Maybe she’d been right that he didn’t take life all that seriously, but this gesture showed another side to him—one she would have a hard time behaving professionally around. When she’d thought he was a playboy-athlete like so many others, it had been easy to dismiss him. But now…
As the enormity of what he’d done fully hit her, a tear escaped to roll down her cheek. Never before had someone seen the injustice her students endured and done something so quickly and yet with so little fanfare. He’d just handed over the check like it was no big deal.

Unbelievable.

Before she could process what was happening, Rob wiped at the wetness with the pad of his thumb. When their gazes collided, Rob’s swift intake of breath startled her. He pulled his hand away as if he’d been burned before turning and pacing away.

What the hell is that all about? No way does a guy like him think I’m hot.

Half turning back toward her, he said, “Anyway, I don’t want to keep you, but I couldn’t just hand over the check after my reading thing and run.”

“Okay.” Alaina approached him then reached a tentative hand to the shoulder nearest her. He was about a head taller than her, and when her hand met his flesh it was like touching granite. Rob was built like a tank, which she supposed was an advantage in the rough and tumble sport of hockey. She couldn’t help but feel safe in his presence.

“I don’t even have the words to express my appreciation. ‘Thank you’ is so inadequate.” Another tear escaped, and she quickly swiped at it. She’d probably freak Rob out if she turned into a waterworks right now.

He sighed and darted a glance at her out of the corner of his eye.
“Don’t thank me. I don’t want your thanks. I only did what anyone else would do.”

She knew that wasn’t true, but remained silent.

“And please don’t make a big deal out of the whole thing. I don’t want some reporter tracking me down thinking the check was a publicity stunt.”

“Whatever you want.” She squeezed his shoulder briefly before letting go.

Rob peeked at her one more time then started for the door like he was rushing from a burning building. “See you next week.”

“See you.” She returned to her desk and fell into the chair to stare at the check. This had to rank as one of the strangest days of her life. Alaina certainly wasn’t used to people recognizing the need for funds and actually coming through for her.

She carefully folded the check into an inside pocket of her purse then walked out to her beat-up Toyota Corolla. Her dad had gotten the car for her as a college graduation present, and it had been well-used even then. Now, six years later, the junk heap was held together with duct tape and a dream.

Find Cassandra Carr here:

Website: http://www.booksbycassandracarr.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/AuthorCassandraCarr
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/cassandra_carr
Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/booksbycasscarr/

About Cassandra Carr

Cassandra Carr is a multi-award winning romance writer who lives in Western New York with her husband, Inspiration, and her daughter, Too Cute for Words. When not writing she enjoys watching hockey and hanging out online.

The Extraordinary Within the Ordinary

Blog, Guest Blogger, New Releases, , , , , ,

Many thanks to the lovely KD Grace for having me over today to discuss sex out of the ordinary.

Demelza Hart 2Where’s the most unexpected place you’ve ever done it? On a train? Aeroplane bathroom? Broom cupboard at work? All popular fantasies.

What is it about sex in mundane, everyday places that turns us on so much? After all, in reality, negotiating the coming together of body parts amongst cramped spaces, wash basins, mops and general daily detritus is a pretty tricky business. It’s certainly not done for the glamour of the location.

No, it’s the overwhelming need which compels us to do it in these places, the engulfing passion which overrides all else: sense, practicality and safety. These places may be entirely ordinary, but if you introduce the extraordinary into them – sex – the danger element makes the excitement of it so much more thrilling. Not only do you risk mistaking a broom handle for something else entirely, you also risk discovery. The exhibitionist in you lurks, daring you on.

Allow me to introduce Tara.

Demelza Hart 3Tara seeks the extraordinary within the ordinary, and in The Suit she’s met someone who can deliver. The Suit – nameless and effortlessly gorgeous – takes the mundane and, by introducing sex, turns it into something entirely irresistible.

Tara developed her taste for this – and for him – on that icon of routine and predictability, the London Underground. We first met her in my short ‘Come Underground’ (in Xcite’s Watching Me, Watching You and Your Ultimate Fantasy anthologies). On that occasion, she spent a trip on the Central Line ably entertained by five anonymous men, one of whom is The Suit. They weren’t supposed to see each other again.

But they do.

In Spontaneous (Book One of the Suited to You trilogy), we meet Tara as she contacts The Suit again. They continue where they left off.

In this extract, The Suit has arranged to meet Tara, telling her he’s going to ‘take her shopping’. With visions of Bond Street in mind, the supermarket where his chauffeur actually drops her isn’t quite what she’d envisaged, but The Suit always delivers.

-xOx-

I paced dejectedly along to the bright lights of the supermarket and strode morosely through the gaping doors. The glare from the store hurt my eyes and the beeping of the checkouts immediately grated on me. This had better bloody be good. I scanned the entrance for signs of The Suit, but could see nothing. Instinctively, I picked up a basket and made my way into the store. It was nearly empty. A few late-night shoppers were stocking up, Demelza Hartbut the aisles were largely deserted save for a few shelf stackers. I glanced around the magazines and cards. No sign. I made my way through homeware and clothing. Nothing. Was he even here?

 I threw a tube of toothpaste into the basket. I’d nearly run out; I may as well make the most of my time here. Then I turned into the broad expanse of the fruit and vegetable aisles. There he stood, still in his suit, studying an apple carefully before replacing it on the pile. I walked over.

‘Out of milk, are you?’ I’d intended to sound tetchy and succeeded. He turned as coolly as ever, his eyes quickly taking in my clothes and appearance.

‘Hello.’ He looked back to the apples. ‘Granny Smith or Pink Lady?’

‘Definitely Pink Lady.’

He took a few, put them in his basket, and moved on. I followed.

‘Why are we here?’

‘It’s an interesting environment.’

‘Is it?’ I wasn’t convinced.

‘I like the mundanity of it. I like the idea of the extraordinary concealed within the ordinary.’

‘And where is the extraordinary? I don’t see it.’

He didn’t answer. His Duchamp tie hung down when he bent over to look at things. I wanted to grab it, tug him round, and have him.

‘So what happens now? Are you going to fuck me with a cucumber?’

He at last deigned to look at me, his mouth rising into a slight smile. ‘Would you like that?’

I shrugged. ‘Maybe. But only if they’re Class One organic cucumbers.’

He glanced above him at a CCTV camera. ‘We’re too visible here. It might be tricky.’

‘I wasn’t serious!’ I added.

‘Why not?’

-xOx-

The cucumbers remain where they are, but The Suit, Tara and another (more than) willing participant go on to take plentiful advantage of the BOGOF deals. Like The Suit says, it’s always worth seeking the extraordinary within the ordinary.

Come and say hello to Demelza on Facebook, Twitter or at her blog. She’d love to get to know you.

Spontaneous (Book One in the Suited to You trilogy) is available now, as is Watching Me, Watching You and Your Ultimate Fantasy (containing ‘Come Underground’).

Buy Spontaneous Here:

Amazon.co.uk

Amazon.com