The Extraordinary Within the Ordinary
Many thanks to the lovely KD Grace for having me over today to discuss sex out of the ordinary.
What is it about sex in mundane, everyday places that turns us on so much? After all, in reality, negotiating the coming together of body parts amongst cramped spaces, wash basins, mops and general daily detritus is a pretty tricky business. It’s certainly not done for the glamour of the location.
No, it’s the overwhelming need which compels us to do it in these places, the engulfing passion which overrides all else: sense, practicality and safety. These places may be entirely ordinary, but if you introduce the extraordinary into them – sex – the danger element makes the excitement of it so much more thrilling. Not only do you risk mistaking a broom handle for something else entirely, you also risk discovery. The exhibitionist in you lurks, daring you on.
Allow me to introduce Tara.
Tara seeks the extraordinary within the ordinary, and in The Suit she’s met someone who can deliver. The Suit – nameless and effortlessly gorgeous – takes the mundane and, by introducing sex, turns it into something entirely irresistible.
Tara developed her taste for this – and for him – on that icon of routine and predictability, the London Underground. We first met her in my short ‘Come Underground’ (in Xcite’s Watching Me, Watching You and Your Ultimate Fantasy anthologies). On that occasion, she spent a trip on the Central Line ably entertained by five anonymous men, one of whom is The Suit. They weren’t supposed to see each other again.
But they do.
In Spontaneous (Book One of the Suited to You trilogy), we meet Tara as she contacts The Suit again. They continue where they left off.
In this extract, The Suit has arranged to meet Tara, telling her he’s going to ‘take her shopping’. With visions of Bond Street in mind, the supermarket where his chauffeur actually drops her isn’t quite what she’d envisaged, but The Suit always delivers.
I paced dejectedly along to the bright lights of the supermarket and strode morosely through the gaping doors. The glare from the store hurt my eyes and the beeping of the checkouts immediately grated on me. This had better bloody be good. I scanned the entrance for signs of The Suit, but could see nothing. Instinctively, I picked up a basket and made my way into the store. It was nearly empty. A few late-night shoppers were stocking up, but the aisles were largely deserted save for a few shelf stackers. I glanced around the magazines and cards. No sign. I made my way through homeware and clothing. Nothing. Was he even here?
I threw a tube of toothpaste into the basket. I’d nearly run out; I may as well make the most of my time here. Then I turned into the broad expanse of the fruit and vegetable aisles. There he stood, still in his suit, studying an apple carefully before replacing it on the pile. I walked over.
‘Out of milk, are you?’ I’d intended to sound tetchy and succeeded. He turned as coolly as ever, his eyes quickly taking in my clothes and appearance.
‘Hello.’ He looked back to the apples. ‘Granny Smith or Pink Lady?’
‘Definitely Pink Lady.’
He took a few, put them in his basket, and moved on. I followed.
‘Why are we here?’
‘It’s an interesting environment.’
‘Is it?’ I wasn’t convinced.
‘I like the mundanity of it. I like the idea of the extraordinary concealed within the ordinary.’
‘And where is the extraordinary? I don’t see it.’
He didn’t answer. His Duchamp tie hung down when he bent over to look at things. I wanted to grab it, tug him round, and have him.
‘So what happens now? Are you going to fuck me with a cucumber?’
He at last deigned to look at me, his mouth rising into a slight smile. ‘Would you like that?’
I shrugged. ‘Maybe. But only if they’re Class One organic cucumbers.’
He glanced above him at a CCTV camera. ‘We’re too visible here. It might be tricky.’
‘I wasn’t serious!’ I added.
The cucumbers remain where they are, but The Suit, Tara and another (more than) willing participant go on to take plentiful advantage of the BOGOF deals. Like The Suit says, it’s always worth seeking the extraordinary within the ordinary.
Spontaneous (Book One in the Suited to You trilogy) is available now, as is Watching Me, Watching You and Your Ultimate Fantasy (containing ‘Come Underground’).
Buy Spontaneous Here: