Category Archives: Guest Blogger

Guest Blogger: Candy Knight

July 10, 2013Guest Bloggercandy knight, erotic anthology, erotic fiction, erotica, guest blogger, writer marketing servicesK D Grace

Thank you so much, KD, for inviting me. I’m very excited to drop by on my début blog tour.

Guest Post

Hi everyone, here’s a little about me. I was born in a quintessential village hidden in the green rolling hills in the Surrey downs, just south of London, in the era when “gay” meant happy and magazine models were not airbrushed beyond all recognition.

I love to read and write erotica and I write stories that are believable with strong characters. I like to interject an element of humour now and then I aim to tell tales that will excite you sexually and fuel desire in you as I seek to stimulate your senses and leave you blushing from the ideas depicted.

The hubs and I have great fun working out all the plots and positions used in stories and we also have a date night once a month which gives me the opportunity to try things out for real 🙂

I’m currently working on my next book, ‘Flight of Fancy’. It’s the first in a trilogy about astral projection, which is the ability to leave the physical body at will and go anywhere and do anything you like. The main character is Becky, an astral planing voyeur, who uses the technique to satisfy her sexual desires but she gets so accomplished that she is able to use it to possess another person’s body and wreak a terrible revenge on them after being betrayed by someone she trusted.

Excerpt

This is from Lapping It Up, the third story in the Ultimate Gift anthology.

As Dawn manoeuvred the car into a tiny space at the rear of ‘MissFlirtyGirls’ dance studio two days later, she was filled with trepidation. Looking at Trudy and noting her pinched face and tight jaw she must have felt much the same. Nevertheless, after climbing the two floors of rickety stairs, steadying themselves on a piece of rope tied along the wall they arrived at the door to meet Miss Flirty, AKA Sandra.

‘Ladies, come in, come in. Are you Dawn and Trudy?’

‘Yes’ Dawn replied somewhat timidly, ‘We spoke on the ‘phone.’

Miss Flirty shook their hands firmly. ‘Don’t look so frightened, I don’t bite. Well not unless you ask me nicely and there is an extra charge.’ Laughing at her own joke she pointed to a screen where they could change.

‘Right girls, you brought your kit? Something loose so that you can get those legs apart.’

As her words registered, both Trudy and Dawn’s cheeks began to flame.

‘Oh come on girls, the first ten minutes is the worse, then you’ll be like old-timers.’

‘Speaking of old’, Trudy ventured. ‘Tell me honestly. Now that you have met us, do you think we’re too old doing this?’

‘What? No way. Don’t be daft, I have a lady in her sixties comes every week, her husband loves it. She’s always needing a few more tricks.’ She winked, her long dark lashes sweeping over her too-rouged cheeks.

Trudy noticed that set out in the middle of the floor were three straight-back chairs. They changed into their outfits and returned to place themselves behind the allotted chair.

Miss Flirty turned on the sultry music and grabbed her chair, twisting it around on one leg theatrically and replacing in on all four so that she could stand behind it.

‘Right, I’ll give a quick run through of the basics and then we’ll break it down into sections and you two can have a go. Don’t worry about looking silly, there’s only us here.’

Trudy and Dawn stood like plastic mannequins whilst the extremely lithe and bendy Miss Flirty went through the routine. They were totally transfixed by what they were seeing. At least Trudy had been watching YouTube but Dawn was a lap dance virgin and couldn’t believe that there was any way that she could achieve all the sliding, bumping and grinding, that Miss Flirty was demonstrating. Feeling intimidated, she looked at Trudy.

‘What do you think? Bitten off more that we can chew?’

To Dawn’s amazement Trudy looked straight at her and said. ‘Hell the fuck, no. Bring it on!’

Blurb and buy links

Ultimate Gift

Elizabeth needs a stiff drink and a hug from her friend after spending six torturous hours in the car with David. On their arrival they meet two stunning guests; the smoking-hot porn star, Suzy, and the dark enigmatic Toby. As the evening progresses inhibitions relax and sexual tensions start to rise. Could this diversion be just what they need to spice up their humdrum marriage or will it go too far?

Dream Surfer

Layne has a passion for impromptu sex in the open air. Her sporting accident prevents her from joining her lover in the surf and he leaves her sunbathing on the secluded beach. As the sun beats down on her near-naked body, her mind starts to drift to the inevitable passion she will share with her lover when he returns cool from the sea to soothe the heat from her body.

Lapping It Up

Married for eighteen years, frustrated housewife Trudy lusts after the passion she once shared with her husband. Recognising that something drastic has to be done, she asks her best friend to help. At first Dawn is flabbergasted by Trudy’s disclosure but agrees to work with her to plan a passionate evening that their husbands will not forget. Will they discover new appetites for their husbands or for each other?

Disciplining Jayne

Jayne fantasises about having sex with a stranger in uniform, just thinking about it makes her hot and wet. She arranges a birthday treat for herself, a night of passion to fulfil her dream. She gives very explicit instructions for the evening’s entertainment. However, her handsome escort has other ideas.

Rumour Has It

The mysterious Kate meets her perfect man when she spills water over his impeccably polished shoes. Tim instantly falls for the striking red-head and spends the nights fulfilling her every need until an unexpected phone call reveals Kate’s secret. Will the revelation rip them apart? Or will lust really overcome?

Unintentional Mistress

Bethany meets Max at a Christmas party and their mutual desire cannot be controlled. Events take an unexpected turn when Bethany discovers that she’s the ‘other women’. She knows that she should walk away, but can she bring herself to leave the sexually-charged Max? Or will she stay and have her heart torn apart?

‘Ultimate Gift’ can be purchased from the following retailers. Just click on the links:

See below for a Smashwords promotion on Candy’s book.

Author bio and links

When Candy Knight gets home from work she cannot wait to start typing. Busy wife and mother she enjoys writing sensitive and erotic stories that will make women wet and men hard.

Inspired by the positive comments and feedback she received whilst attending an erotic/creative writing course she decided to continue to apply what she had learned. Striving to write what she refers to as ‘decent filth’, she is so driven to achieve her erotic writing passion that she has given up two days a week ‘paid’ work in order to follow her dream.

Candy loves to drink wine, ride her bike, called Giselle, have a good laugh and indulge in great sex. But not necessarily in that order.

As well as releasing her first anthology ‘Ultimate Gift’, Candy has also completed the first of three erotic paranormal voyeur stories from the ‘Flight’ series.

Candy’s work is strictly for adults who want to unwind at the end of the day and get down and dirty. So pour a glass of wine and enjoy this writer’s work.

For more information on Candy, click the links below:

Website: www.candyknight.com

Blog: www.candyknight.com/candys-blog/

Twitter: @candyknight69

Facebook: www.facebook.com/candy.knight.75

Promotion

For the month July if you purchase a copy of ‘Ultimate Gift’ from Smashwords using promotional code HP44Z you’ll received a 50% saving! Enter the promo code at the checkout.

Genderf*cking a Classic: Setting Traditional Sexuality on its Ear, and Loving It by Lula Lisbon

July 5, 2013Guest BloggerBDSM, cinderella a bdsm retelling, erotic fiction, erotica, guest blogger, lula lisbonK D Grace

How can one ever retell such a well-known classic as Cinderella without repeating what’s been said a thousand times before? Sure, helpless damsels and larger-than-life alpha males have their place, judging from perennial sales figures, but as a self-described queer woman, I am pretty tired of it. Before I came out, I had two long-term boyfriends and a love of romance novels — but eventually I felt as if I were chafing against the norms, knowing somehow that there was something else in life, a perpetual hunger and longing for something to which I could barely put words.

I don’t mean to crassly distill the coming-out process like this, but simply to shed some light on the evolution of my own mind as well as the thought processes which led to Cinderella: A BDSM Retelling’s conception. How much hotter, I thought, would it be for Cinderella and her prince both to explore and break through notions of traditional gender roles as well as gender itself?

As humans, we are complex creatures: we can be both male and female, submissive and dominant, shy and bold, without necessarily being pigeonholed or burdened by these concepts. We don’t have to pick one and stick with it, despite what society says. It’s okay to explore, to try different ideas on for size; wearing them every day, keeping them in storage for use as needed, or discarding those old rags entirely — and it’s okay for all these things to change as you grow into, fluctuate within, and learn about your own sexuality.

I think it’s probably a common fantasy to think about being a gender not the one you were assigned at birth; despite my misgivings about Freud, I think penis (and vagina!) envy merits discussion, if in a more sexually open-minded way. And I don’t think that such fantasies necessitate perversity or unhappiness, or even homosexuality. What I do think is that it’s okay to be curious, that it’s natural to explore and fantasize, and that it’s sad that so many people need permission to do so.

Cinderella as a character is sexually fluid; I’d describe her as heteroflexible. She has sex with women and men, but her main fantasies involve men — specifically, dominating them and forcing them to serve her with body, mind, and soul. Kink-Bottom Prince, a well-known submissive, is quite straight – despite enjoying anal and receiving forced feminization from his Mistress. Sexually underrepresented in society, sure, but deviant? I beg to differ. I think that this sort of free exploration is exactly the sort of fresh challenge that will blow tired tropes and outdated roles out of the water.

Could the concept of genderf*ckery indicate the beginning of a fresh Wave of Feminism? Embracing gender or the lack thereof, embracing roles or the lack thereof… it could level the sexual playing field in an entirely new way. I find the idea thoroughly refreshing.

EXCLUSIVE EXCERPT:

With the raucous noise of the Ravyns’ party in the main hall echoing up the stairs, Cinderella nibbled on a bit of stale bread and butter. She had taken it from the kitchen while the chef had had his back turned, but she didn’t possess much of an appetite for food that night. In her dimly-lit attic room, she undressed slowly in front of her cracked and age-spotted looking glass. Taking her time to caress each part of herself, looking deeply into her own eyes in the mirror — dilated wide and black with desire, the emerald irises nearly as dark in the dim room — she longed for a perfect slave of her very own. Little miss Candi had been amusing, but he was not her ideal.

Her perfect submissive would be the one to unlace her corset, to undo her garters and slip off her shoes. He would take her toes in his mouth, one by one, swirling a hot tongue around each in turn as he looked up at her shyly through the veil of his eyelashes. He would pull off her gloves with his teeth, and give each finger the same treatment. He would worship every bit of her body, thinking only of serving her and bringing her pleasure however he might. His own pleasure would always be a distant second to hers.

Her perfect slave would be on his knees, begging with his eyes for her to strap on and fuck him senseless with her thickest cock. He would put the harness on her, and she would choose the cock — smirking at the wide-eyed look of alarm when he saw it, and she knew he was wondering how he’d take such a big shaft. His fear was a spur, and it would be a delicious struggle to keep herself in check. He would still be on his knees, and she’d slip two fingers into his mouth, forcing it open to accept her cock. His eyes would slit half-closed in pleasure, head bobbing, and with every stroke he’d take it that much deeper into his hungry throat. She loved that it was his job to service her: to service her cunt, service her cock, even service her ass if she so chose. Pleasing her would be first in his duties, always; and if he did so sufficiently, perhaps he’d be rewarded with permission to cum.

Cinderella laid down on her hard, lumpy bed, hands skimming sweetly over her nude curves. Her skin was prickled with gooseflesh, partly from the chill air of the sparse room and partly from her fantasy. Her breath was coming quick and shallow, and she couldn’t help but moan a little with each exhalation. Her left hand kneaded her breasts, pulling on the nipples, pinching them, while her right middle finger danced lightly over her hot, smooth slit. Teasing herself, she circled her clit a few times before dipping lower, feeling the soft crinkled flesh of the edges of her labia contrasting with the pure slick heat between them.

Her slave would be forced to swallow his own cum, of course — nothing else would do. He would probably hate it at first, but that would, in fact, give her no end of sadistic delight. And as he grew accustomed to it, he’d begin to associate the taste of his own passion with what she did to him, with what she meant to him, until he craved the taste of his own cum as much as he craved her body, her cunt, and her cock. She would get him to the point where the thrusting of her cock deep in his ass, combined with the taste of his own cum, would make him climax, truly climax — full-body ecstasy just as women experience it, shuddering with it for minutes on end. His eyes would roll up into the back of his head, gasping and uttering feminine, high-pitched moans. He would be her little sissy girl, coming for her just like the sweet slut he was.

BLURB:

Dominas Arabelle and Druscilla Ravyn’s talented apprentice, Cinderella, wants to become a Mistress, but the cruel stepsisters thwart her at every turn. When famous rock star Kink-Bottom Prince is seeking a new Mistress from all those in the City, poor Cinderella doesn’t think she stands a chance. But a kind Fairy Kink Mother magically appears to help Cinderella win her Prince’s collar — and heart.

This 21,000+ word erotic novella contains menage, femdom, a submissive rock star getting fucked in front of his fans, spanking, whipping, magical strap-ons that come to life, pegging, face-sitting, forced feminization and sissification, a self-satisfied Fairy Kink Mother, squirting, fisting, exhibitionism, comedy relief, and much more!

AUTHOR BIO:

A femme queer-identified woman residing in Philadelphia, Lula Lisbon enjoys penning LGBT erotica and romance. Lula’s interests include historical fashions, dark music, and craft beers. She loves to bicycle as much as possible, and stays tight and toned with a grueling regime of pole dance fitness classes.

Lula’s femdom story “Icing on the Cake” is her first to be included in a print anthology — editor Rachel Kramer Bussel’s The Big Book of Orgasms. It will be released by Cleis Press in October 2013.

Lula loves to hear from her fans, and they can find her on Twitter: @LulaLisbon; on Facebook: www.facebook.com/authorlulalisbon; on her website: www.lulalisbon.com; or they can email her directly at Lula.Lisbon@gmail.com.

Cinderella: A BDSM Retelling is now available at Smashwords, Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Kobo, Rainbow eBooks, and soon available on Sony, Diesel, and iTunes.

As for Lula’s entire catalogue, it is available at Amazon, Smashwords, Barnes and Noble, iTunes, Sony, Kobo, Diesel, and Rainbow eBooks.

GIVEAWAY:

Leave your email address and your thoughts on this post in the comments section to be entered to win an eBook copy of Doubled: An Erotic Science Fiction Novelette by Lula Lisbon.

High-Sticked by Lily Harlem

July 3, 2013Guest BloggerEllora's Cave, erotic romance, erotica, gay, high-sticked, Hot Ice, Lily Harlem, m/m, sports romanceK D Grace

High-Sticked is Book #5 in Lily Harlem’s popular HOT ICE series – http://www.lilyharlem.com/hot-ice.html. All of these sexy hockey books can be enjoyed as stand-alone stories though if you read them in the order you’ll meet the hero of each next book as you go along. High-Sticked is the only M/M in the set and follows the story of Rangers player Todd Carty and professional photographer Matthew Foster. It’s hot, it’s spicy and is sure to hit the spot!

Blurb

Dating Todd “Pretty” Carty was a trailblazing, headline-grabbing ride that shocked and divided a team, a sport and a nation. While controversy ruled, our feelings exploded and we couldn’t deny the desire that sizzled between us. Nothing, however, was easy outside the bedroom. Not when my world-class, fearless athlete wanted to shout from Everest that he was in love with another man.

But laying my heart on the line and having my picture dominating the papers was worth it. Everything about Todd turned me on. His bold hockey skills, his courageous attitude and the way he melted in my arms when I kissed him. I melted too, because he knew how to press my buttons, remind me of the man I used to be and take me to those places where ecstasy ruled.

The world might have trouble accepting us, but we’d committed to each other, mind, body and soul, and nothing could change that.

Buy Links

Ellora’s Cave

Amazon UK

Amazon US

Excerpt

He looked so damn sexy standing next to the bed. Tall and broad but with a certain vulnerability about him that made me want to get all alpha and protect him. Though I knew that with those fine muscles of his and that sharp speed he needed no physical protection. But I couldn’t help myself. I just wanted to make things right for him—more than right, perfect.

I stepped up to him, my cock already swollen well past a semi. “Lift,” I said, gripping the base of his jersey.

He raised his arms and allowed me to peel it over his head. I dropped it to the floor where it landed silently.

His chest was beautiful. I’d seen it many times on the shoots, but now I didn’t need to disguise the lust or admiration in my eyes. Now I could feast on the sight of his dark little nipples that were small and permanently erect. Stroking my hand over his sternum, I circled each one in turn. Felt him tremble beneath my touch and heard his sigh when I brushed over the slightly pliant stalks.

“You’re bloody gorgeous,” I breathed.

He didn’t answer. I guess he’d heard it enough times before.

My cock was full-on hard now. But I was under control. I had to be, for both our sakes.

Todd wore jeans and a brown leather belt with a silver buckle. Luckily my hands were steadier than the tripping of my heart as I released the clasp and popped open the buttons on his pants.

He was hard too. I could see his cock straining forward. The outline of it was visible beneath the material and the swollen head butted the tip of the waistband.

My mouth watered and my hands tingled at the thought of holding, tasting, worshipping his cock for the first time.

But that wasn’t what I had planned. Not yet, anyway.

After loosening his pants, I pushed them down his legs. It took all my willpower to leave his white briefs in place and not expose his cock, but I did it. I couldn’t trust myself. If I saw him all hot and hard then I would devour him. In one go.

He stepped out of the jeans and slipped off his socks.

I tugged back the thick navy duvet. “Get in bed,” I said, my voice husky even to my own ears.

Without a word, he slid in and lay on his back, his arms bent behind his head, his cock tenting his briefs.

He watched me as I began to strip. When I wore only my boxers, I scooted in next to him.

A small shiver moved over his body.

“You okay?” I asked.

“Sure.”

“Cold?”

“A little.”

I pulled the duvet so it covered both our shoulders then pressed the length of my body to the side of his. He wasn’t cold, he felt warm and solid and his leg hairs meshed with mine. “Turn this way,” I whispered. “Face me.”

He did as instructed, sliding one hand over my waist and tucking the other beneath his cheek. We were nose-to-nose.

“Remember when we first kissed on the sofa?” I asked against his lips.

“You know damn well I do.”

“Well, that’s what we’re going to do again. Only this time there’ll be no ordering me to leave.”

“If you left I’d die.”

“Don’t be so dramatic, you’re a sportsman not an actor.”

He laughed and as he opened his mouth I kissed him. Probed my tongue in and tangled it with his.

Instantly he kissed me back, a small moan filtering up from his throat and swirling out from between our lips. I ran my hand down his arm, onto his waist and stopped on his brief-covered hip. “Like this,” I murmured, “but closer.”

I tugged him toward me and he helped the movement by shuffling.

Our cocks came into alignment, only the barrier of our underwear separating them. “Matthew,” he gasped, gripping my hip the way I was his. “Fuck, you’re so hard.”

“Hard for you.” Damn, he felt good. His cock was as long as I’d suspected it would be from our brief introduction through jeans. It felt thick and wide too, a steel bar of burning rigidity.

“Feeling you against me makes my nuts so tight,” he groaned, shifting his hips so his shaft rubbed up mine on a long, concrete stroke.

I sucked in a breath of warm air. “Yeah, I know what you mean.” My balls were getting the familiar achy pressure that meant they’d be building to an explosion soon. “Lose these,” I said, plucking at the elastic waistband of his briefs.

He didn’t need asking twice.

As he pushed his down, I shoved at mine. My cock sprang free and a modicum of pressure lifted from the turgid shaft.

He gripped my hip again, tight.

I groaned and allowed the wondrous fist of desire to claim me, clamped my hand on his ass and squeezed our cocks firmly against each other.

“Matthew,” he gasped.

“That’s it. Fuck, it’s good.”

“Yes, oh god, yes. More. I want us to come together.”

“We will.” I began to shift my hips, a rhythmic grind that rubbed our cocks together, up and down. The shafts generated a scalding friction that heated with each and every movement.

He copied me, met me roll for roll, thrust for thrust. His fingers were pincerlike on my butt and his mouth covered mine.

We kissed, rubbed, slid into each other until our breaths were erratic and my heart pounded. My brain was sparking, firing from a hundred points all focused on Todd.

I wanted to reach down, fist our cocks in a clamping grip, but I didn’t. When I touched Todd’s cock for the first time I wanted to be calm and savor every moment. Right now I was on the brink of climax.

“Ah, I’m coming,” I gasped into his mouth.

“Yes, come, fuck, come now.”

Blistering pressure raced up the center of my cock, the intensity almost dragging my balls with it. I couldn’t breathe, my stomach pinched into a tight knot and suddenly it was there. A beautiful moment of fulfillment. Warm heat burst from me, another shot followed, fizzing and popping onto my stomach in a gooey slap.

A sharp cry escaped Todd and I let the sound swirl within me. He too was coming. The sound of his orgasm was gloriously uninhibited, unlike earlier when he’d tried to suppress it.

I tightened my fingers on his butt, holding him as he shook and shuddered and moaned through his release. More cum landed between us, sticky and hot, basting our abdomens.

He ran his hand to the back of my neck, supporting my nape as his tongue delved into my mouth. His breaths were erratic and noisy against my cheek. The smell of sex and cum and fresh sweat circulated upward, the stuffy air of the duvet intensifying the scent.

Suddenly hot, I flicked the covers off. A cool waft of air caressed my sticky body and I sucked in much-needed oxygen.

“That was fucking amazing,” Todd gasped.

“That was just foreplay.”

“Fuck!” He grinned and a wild, happy flash seared across his eyes.

I laughed and flopped onto my back, staring at the shadow-strung ceiling. “Yeah, fuck! Foreplay to fucking.”

hot ice

Lily Harlem Bio

Lily Harlem lives in the UK and is an award-winning author of contemporary erotic romance. She writes for publishers on both sides of the Atlantic including Ellora’s Cave, HarperCollins, Total-E-Bound, Xcite and Sweetmeat Press. Her HOT ICE series regularly receives high praise and industry nominations.

Before turning her hand to writing Lily Harlem worked as a trauma nurse and her latest HarperCollins release, Confessions of a Naughty Night Nurse, draws on her many experiences while nursing in London. Lily also self-publishes and The Glass Knot and Scored have been blessed with many 5* reviews since their release in 2012.

Her latest m/f novel, Breathe You In, is a super-sexy romance with a twist that will not only heat you up but stay with you for years to come.

One thing you can be sure of, whatever book you pick up by Ms Harlem, is it will be wildly romantic and down-and-dirty sexy. Enjoy!

Lily Harlem Links

Website http://www.lilyharlem.com/

Blog http://www.lilyharlem.blogspot.com/

Twitter https://twitter.com/lily_harlem

Facebook http://en-gb.facebook.com/people/Lily-Harlem/100003519563064

Facebook author page http://www.facebook.com/pages/Lily-Harlem-author-page/200182030094568

Pinterest http://pinterest.com/lilyharlem/

Goodreads http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4070110.Lily_Harlem

Google+ https://plus.google.com/u/0/106837751333678531161/posts

Ultimate Gift by Candy Knight

July 1, 2013Guest Bloggercandy knight, erotic anthology, erotic fiction, erotica, guest blogger, ultimate giftK D Grace

Blurb

Ultimate Gift

Dream Surfer

Lapping It Up

Disciplining Jayne

Rumour Has It

Unintentional Mistress

Excerpts

Ultimate Gift

Guy proffered me a black shiny olive on a cocktail stick. I opened my mouth and hooking my tongue around it I plucked it off. He smiled seductively and stabbed another suggestively, this time a green one stuffed with bright red pepper. He held it to his lips and kissed it before popping it into my mouth. I had never perceived that anything so innocent could be so sexually electrifying.

Dream Surfer

I unzipped my too-short shorts and wriggled them down over my hips. I had my bikini pants on underneath, well what there was of them. I couldn’t help thinking that it was a good job my dad couldn’t see me or he would have a fit. I pulled my tight white tee shirt over my head and tossed it to one side.

Lapping It Up

Martin had pushed his chair back from the table and was about to stand up but I went behind him and put my hands on his shoulders. “Stay there”, I commanded. “I have a surprise for you” I murmured, in my best sultry voice.

Disciplining Jayne

She adored men in uniform, any uniform, they made her hot and wet. The Captain smiled lasciviously pushing a room key card along the bar toward her. ‘Room 401. You go up and I will join you in a moment.’

Rumour Has It

Moving his warm hand to my breast he caressed it over the smooth satin of my blouse, pinching my nipple between finger and thumb. I put my arm around his neck and pulled him towards me and slid my other hand up the inside of his thigh. He had long muscular legs that I just couldn’t help wanting to explore.

Unintentional Mistress

He pushed her into the corner of the back seat and parted her legs and ran his hand up the inside of her thigh. The soft skin between stocking and pussy yielded to his touch. Apart from the beautiful dress tightly knotted around her slim waist and hold-up stockings she was completely naked.

Buy Links
Smashwords
Barnes & Noble
Amazon UK
Amazon US
Kobobooks.com
Diesel eBooks

Author Bio

When Candy Knight gets home from work she cannot wait to start typing. Busy wife and mother she enjoys writing sensitive and erotic stories that will make women wet and men hard.

Further inspired by the positive comments and feedback she received whilst attending an erotic/creative writing course she decided to continue to apply what she had learned. Striving to write what she refers to as ‘decent filth’, she is so driven to achieve her erotic writing passion that she has given up two days a week ‘paid’ work in order to follow her dream.

Having self published her first short story, ‘Unintentional Mistress’ on Amazon, she’s excited about writing more erotica. As well as releasing her first anthology ‘Ultimate Gift, Candy has also completed the first of three erotic paranormal voyeur stories from the ‘Flight’ series.

Candy’s work is strictly for adults who want to unwind at the end of the day and get hard and wet. So pour a glass of wine and enjoy this writer’s work.

Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner: Chris Unity Bowness’s Contribution to Adult Sex Ed Month

June 26, 2013Blog, Guest BloggerAdult sex education month, Chris Unity Bowness, Consenting Adults, sex after pregnancyK D Grace

We often think of sex education in terms of children and teens and rarely acknowledged the need for adult sex education but we are surrounded by the need for it every day from forums, blogs and social media. Adults are constantly looking for advice and discussion on sex and relationships. We all are. Sex is one of those subjects we’re never done with and are always learning and expanding our experiences.

Communication is the key to good sexual relationships, but often it’s something we are not good at – talking about s-e-x. #Adultsexedmonth in June A Good Woman’s Dirty Mind was set up just for that reason; to help open up the discussion on sex and share experiences and knowledge. The beauty of it is that people don’t have to specifically ask for it. They can just go to the site.

This month I thought I would share my own experiences of a time when I have noticed the need for, not just adult sex ed, but also for sex positivity and that is post pregnancy. Through sharing a little of my own experiences and the shared experiences of women and men in relationships I hope to give a positive voice and some helpful information to those people ready to go back to having sex after childbirth.

Postpartum

It’s important to mention that medically women are advised to wait 6 weeks after they’ve given birth before they are fully cleared to have sex. However research by Sari van Anders shows that some women cleared to have sex after 6 weeks still find it very uncomfortable while other women can enjoy some form of sexual pleasure as early as 2 weeks. The part of the research that really struck a chord with me was this:

“Health-care providers often don’t discuss too much about sexuality before that six-week period except to express that women shouldn’t be doing anything penetrative until after that timeframe,” [Sari] van Anders said. “But our data suggest that women are engaging in a host of behaviors and that they have desire.”

Based on my experiences in helping women who are upset and frustrated with their efforts to reintroduce sex post pregnancy, I would take it further to say that beyond medical advice, providers aren’t comfortable promoting information about positive sex and pleasure before or after 6 weeks. Many even wonder why someone would want to even bother with sex now that they’ve had a baby. In one situation I dealt with a woman had been told to slather KY Jelly on, lie back and think of England. Such a response not only perpetuates negative sexual ideas about women and men but also leaves women feeling demoralised, shamed and negative about their bodies – still without answers.

Men and postpartum reintroduction of sex

How are men viewed in the postpartum reintroduction of sex in the relationship? From the situations I’ve dealt with and experienced myself there seem to be a couple of prevalent assumptions. Either men are the perpetrators of reintroducing sex or they don’t want to reintroduce sex into the relationship because they’ve seen their partners go through the suffering of childbirth, and their body now seems like hallowed ground not to be touched.

Both assumptions fail to take into account the compassion and empathy of the men involved. From my own experiences and those others have shared with me, it is often the case that while a women may be craving pleasure and intimacy her partner may be unable to reciprocate, not because he questions her; not because of the visual trauma; not because he’s bothered by how her body looks after pregnancy. He may not be able to reciprocate because having watched his beloved go through pregnancy and all the other post pregnancy stresses he’s worried about how delicate her body may be and he’s trying to empathise with what she’s been through.

Motivations and Methods

According to the research the reasons people do want to go back to having sex are more psychological than physical. There is a need for intimacy and closeness to their partners during what is a stressful time.

Inevitably people will go back to sex after pregnancy whenever they feel ready. Sometimes that happens before six weeks and sometimes after. It could be 5 days it could be 5 months. Discouraging someone who wants to go back to giving or receiving pleasure, or self-pleasuring before six weeks is giving them poor and negative information, which isn’t doing anyone any good and will only create more upset, frustration and shame. When it comes to reintroducing sex in a relationship postpartum arming people with accurate information, support and advice and encouraging them to have sex when they feel ready is a more positive approach than saying don’t do it yet.

The most important advice I can give to women is to listen to their bodies, take their own time, set their own pace, not just during the time leading to the postpartum return to sex but also during intimacy — whether it be penetrative sex or otherwise. Self pleasure can also be a great way for a woman to reconnect with her body after pregnancy, helping her learn what changes may have occurred but also helping prepare her with things that may happen, such as dryness.

Preparation for having sex again after pregnancy is also an important topic. Not only is there contraception to plan for but also other issues which may need to be talked through such as lubricant. There are many more available brands than KY Jelly that are plain, unscented and water safe such as Durex and I.D. Lubricants. Planning when to have sex and scheduling time is also really important as things might not go to plan. While quickie sex can be gentle, fulfilling and keep you connected, after pregnancy making a little more time and space for the reintroduction of sex at a comfortable pace is especially important – and even more so that first time. I tell people that even though it may seem a bit clinical and methodical, taking the time to plan the occasion and the details means that when the hour or so window of opportunity presents itself the couple will be ready to dive in.

Like all good sex, post pregnancy sex requires good communication, not only during sex but in the preparations for intimacy. A lot of the issues surrounding the re-introduction of sex after pregnancy can be worked through with good communication. Communicating how both partners feel about the reintroduction of sex and when and why can really be the catalyst for closer intimacy.

Find Chris Here:

http://www.multiple-asms.org/

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