I’m so excited to kick off my new Passionate Partners series on A Hopeful Romantic. Maybe more than any other question, we erotic authors are asked how our partners feel about our writing. When sex is our chosen subject it’s no surprise that people want to know how that effects the dynamic of our most personal relationships. Most of you know that my lovely hubby, Raymond is my number one fan and supporter, and that I couldn’t manage half of what I do without his help and support. But there are lots of passionate partners out there, who help us erotic authors and cheer us on in many different ways.
One of the couples I’ve come to know personally and admire deeply is the fabulous team of Victoria Blisse and Kevin Mitnik. It’s my pleasure to interview them as my first Passionate Partners. They’ve joined me on A Hopeful Romantic to give us a little peek into their passionate partnership.
Kevin Mitnik is a Husband, Father, Evertonian, Manic Depressive, Whovian, Geek and Award-Winning Web Designer. His Plugins, Hacks, Mods, Styles, Skins and Addons for vBulletin, WordPress, MercuryBoard, PHPBB and other Scripts have won various awards and nominations.
His Erotic Community JustErotica won a Community Webbie, and the original design for Victoria Blisse won an Innovationz Webbie. He now divides his time between helping his Wife with her Projects and tending to his Kingdom in The Settlers Online.
Learn more at Mitnik22.co.uk
Victoria Blisse is a mother, wife, Christian, Manchester United fan and award winning erotica author. She is also the editor of several Bigger Briefs collections, Smut by the Sea and Smut in the City.
She is equally at home behind a laptop or a cooker and she loves to create stories, poems, cakes and biscuits that make people happy. She was born near Manchester, England and her northern English quirkiness shows through in all of her stories. Passion, love and laughter fill her works, just as they fill her busy life.
Find out more at http://victoriablisse.co.uk or follow and friend Victoria: http://twitter.com/victoriablisse http://facebook.com/victoriablisse
Victoria and Kevin have been married for 12 years and met online 15 years ago back before it was all the rage to do so! They work together at blisseuk.com on various author promotions such as Blisse Kisses, Blissemas and more.
KD: Victoria and Kevin, I consider the two of you an amazing team when it comes to supporting each other and promoting the celebration of sexuality through erotica. How did the journey begin, and has it always been a team effort?
Victoria: It’s all Kevin’s fault in the first place! I had a dream one night, a sexy dream, and it wouldn’t leave me alone so Kev said to write it down. I did, and he thought it was good so he told me to post it at literotica.com for people to read and again, I did. I got great feedback and I’ve been writing ever since!
Kevin: Really it started as Victoria’s writing but I was always behind the scenes, helping with editing and putting together and running her website. As time went by we’ve expanded into promotions for other authors as there seemed to be a gap in the market for a bit of Blisse and now we both put a lot of time and effort into running different events like the Sunday Snog every week and Blissemas in December.
KD: Victoria, what does Kevin do to help your writing career that you appreciate more than anything else?
Victoria: It’s the support and encouragement. He does everything from listening to me read out my stories and helping me edit them to letting me go all around the country to attend book signings and conferences to further my career. He even cooks, cleans and looks after the daughter if I have a deadline I’ve got to work to! He never ever falters in his support of me and my writing and I love that.
KD: Kevin, what, so far (knowing that there are lots more such moments ahead) has been the moment in Victoria’s career when you’ve been the most proud of her?
Kevin: There’s been a few but I guess it would be when I went with Victoria to Erotica last year and I saw her standing up and reading in front of a crowd, answering questions and being so confident with all those strangers. She was so professional and I was proud to be there with my famous author wife!
KD: What has been the craziest experience you’ve shared in your mutual journey through erotica?
Kevin: That would probably be Erotica again with the adult babies, the tight pants, the corsets and the sexuality on show.
Victoria: And meeting all those strange authorly types in the flesh. All as mad as hatters you know!
Kevin: Just like you.
Victoria: Well, yes. That is probably true.
KD: Hmmm. They sound like my kind of people.
KD: Kevin, you are actually coming into your own as an erotic author too. Has that changed the dynamic of the way the two of you work together?
Kevin: I’ve always written bits and pieces and having Victoria in the industry already it gave me the confidence to submit my story to the Get Off Three Porn stars contest. I was surprised when I actually won. I’m not planning on a full time erotic writing career as such, I’ll leave that to the wife, but it’s fun to join in with a story of my own now and then.
KD: What’s the hardest part of the Blisse/Mitnik working partnership?
Kevin: Having time to still be a couple between all the writing and website designing and promoting and traveling for readings and whatever. We need more time.
Victoria: I’d say it’s aligning the different ways we work. I am a multi-tasker and a procrastinator and so I don’t always run to time. Kevin is very focused and when he has a task to do his mind will not wander from that even for a minute. Sometimes we frustrate each other just by being ourselves!
KD: What’s the best part?
Kevin: The mutual support.
Victoria: Working with my bestest mate in all the world. And the sex. Though generally that’s not technically a part of the job.
Kevin: But you told me it was!
Victoria: Research Dear, Research!
KD: I happen to know that the two of you are committed to the celebration of sexuality and erotica in a much larger way than just to writing. In fact, you two are the master minds behind an event I’m certainly looking forward to next June, Smut By the Sea in Scarborough. Now that’s a huge team effort. Tell us a bit about it.
Victoria: Smut by the Sea is a daylong event on the 22nd June 2013 to celebrate all things kinky and erotic including writing. Especially the anthologies of the same name.
Kevin: It’ll be at Scarbrough Library and the day event is free for people wander in, listen to some readings, browse the erotic market and have a brew. The evening will be a swanky book launch with readings from the Smut by the Sea anthologies and a chance to get your books signed! This will be £10 on the night or you can get yourself an earlybird ticket for just £5 right now: http://smutbythesea.eventbrite.co.uk/
Victoria: And all the info is up at http://smutbythesea.co.uk as we get more details they will go up on the website. The event is still in the planning stages and loads more fun and sexiness will be added to it by the time June comes around!
KD: What’s the best advice the two of you can offer to make that strange and wonderful relationship between erotica writers and their partners run smoother?
Kevin: Honesty. You have to be open with one another about what you’re doing and why you’re doing it. Also Support is really important, sometimes there are going to be rejections and fussy editors you need to be there to give solace when needed and reassurance and encourage them to continue.
Victoria: I’d say communication is really important. Like I need to let Kevin know when I have deadlines so he realises I’m not avoiding him, I’m just busy. I need to know when Kevin has websites to finish or covers to make so that I can give him the time and space he needs to do that. Being able to give constructive criticism is good too. I know when Kevin tells me to change something in a story it’s not because he’s being a pain in the bum it’s because he wants it to be the best it can be. Same goes for me suggesting a different font or colour on a page or a cover Kevin is designing. We urge each other to be the best we can be.
KD: Besides Smut By The Sea, what future plans for Blisse/Mitnik?
Victoria: We Have Smut and Magic on the 27th October at Sh! Womenstore in Hoxton, London. This is a joint event with your good self, KD, and will be great fun as we are providing the Smut with Lucy Felthouse and you’re bringing the magic with Riding the Ether. This is the first Smut in the City event and I know it’s going to be great. For more details check: http:// http://smutinthecity.co.uk/
Kevin: And we have plans for more Smut events in future. This is just the start of our smutty journey!
Victoria: Oh and of course there is Blissemas which we will both be running in December. One lucky winner will receive a kindle fire! For details check: http://blissemas.co.uk
Kevin: And there might be something a little cheeky and blisseful for Eastertime next year too! Look out for the Blisse Bunnies in the new year!
KD: Wow! It’s amazing what a little teamwork can do. You two are phenomenal! Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing a few of the secrets of Passionate Partners. I’ll see you both in London for Smut and Magic!
Thanks for having us to visit, KD and I’m so proud to be part of the first partnership featured!
It’s such a pleasure to have you two on my site to launch this new feature! You should know that it was you two who inspired it. Thanks for sharing.
Kxxx
Thanks for having us Sweetie, it has been a fun journey into the world of Erotica with one of the highlights being meeting you. It’s always nice to see the couples doing this together and to help them with the challenges ahead.
Attending Events together can be such fun and a nice way for couples to bond.
LikewiseHon! Likewise! It’s been a pleasure having the two of you as my guests, and lovely to hear you and Victoria share your story. I agree, events are a lot of fun together. Raymond and I always enjoy them so much. Looking forward to seeing you and Victoria in October!
Great interview! I think a lot of people get support and and encouragement at work (or at least, I hope they do!), but writers often work at home. Your spouse might not be doing the same work you are (or even half as much as Kevin does), but that support and encouragement is still so vital. “I’m proud of you” can sustain a writer for weeks.
Couldn’t agree with you more, Shar! Knowing that Raymond is proud of me keeps me going when nothing else will. It really DOES matter. There are lots of ways in which spouses are supportive, and that’s really the main reason I wanted to do this series, to uncover some of those wonderful ways spouses support their writerly Other Half.
Mine does things like bring me coffee in bed first thing in the morning, cook lunch and dinner, and clean my office. Seriously–he gave my bulletin board a “makeover” once that was amazing! I’m just no good at organizing and filing and stuff, and he is. He doesn’t even read my books, really–just not a fiction reader. But he supports *me*.
Like I said, Shar, there are SO many ways, and for every writer, what helps most is different, and what helps most is something their partner alone does for them. Which I think is the best part. Your OH sounds amazing! Wouldn’t want to do a post on Passionat Partners for me, would you???
So great to hear about what happens ‘behind the stories’ as it were. What a brilliant feature, I can’t wait to read about more writers!
Jen x
It is fun, isn’t it, Jen? I certainly enjoy all my lovely author guests sharing their secrets.
Kx