All posts by K D Grace

The Sex Toy Incentive

My husband, Raymond, is a great promoter of my work, and he’s been known to sell a novel or three through his extensive social media contacts, and word of mouth. He’s full of great ideas to gets more attention for my work. One of those ideas resulted in a discussion about teaming up sexy novels with sex toys to enhance the reading experience and encourage further purchases. Raymond is an engineer, a born problem solver, always trying to figure ways to make systems more efficient. He commented that this combination was great for print books, but what about eBooks? In true engineer fashion, he came up with the perfect solution, Kindles with ‘attachments!’ I reckon that would give a whole new meaning to the term Kindle Fire.

Sex toy incentiveMG00625-20140322-1049That got us thinking how many things could be improved with the extra-added incentive of a sex toy. Even a subtle little bullet vibe discretely packaged and slipped into the bags of fast-food take-out meals would make for better sales and vastly improve the quality of the meal. This could be the adult version of a Happy Meal … a Very Happy Meal. It would be a way to burn off those high-cal lunches and have a yummy ‘dessert’ that’s totally calorie-free and releases more endorphins than even good chocolate.

And fast food meals would be just the beginning. Imagine bullet vibes and cock rings instead of wafer thin mints at restaurants. Maybe each restaurant could have its name and info printed on the side, sort of like a calling card that won’t get tossed in the bottom of the bag and forgotten about. It would be a subtle little reminder that good food and good sex go together.

Sex toy incentives in hotel rooms would be even more beneficial – especially on those long, lonely business trips. Forget the ink pen and pad on the nightstand, forget the choccies on the pillow. A little vibe’ll do ya, or a Tenga Egg strategically placed, maybe a vibrating cock ring? Yes, I know a lot of hotels offer discrete access to steamy films, but you have to pay for those. It just seems to me that a little something extra on the night table or on the pillow would be such a nice way of saying, ‘we appreciate your business. Please come again.’

Restaurants and hotel rooms would only be the beginning of the sex-toys incentive program. Once people saw the benefit, I could see it becoming a way to promote better habits in the work place – efficiency being rewarded by a little personal time in the loo with the sex toy of the week. Sounds like the perfect carrot on the end of the stick to me.

From the work place, the sky’s the limits. I think sex toys would be fabulous incentive for negotiating treaties and trade-agreements. Win-win deals would be rewarded by vibes, cock rings and Tenga Eggs all around, then everyone would be off back to the hotel for a nice celebratory wank.

Now I can already imagine people complaining that sex for one would make a partner superfluous. My response to that is what’s fun for one is twice as much fun for two. And after spending time at the fabulous Sh! Women’s Erotic Emporium in London drinking pink fizz, listening to steamy stories while totally surrounded by sex toys, I can say that a party with sex toys and fizz would not go unappreciated. I can’t think of a friendlier way to wrap up negotiations.

From sexy novels with vibes to Kindles with attachments to Tenga treaties Fleshlight finance, I think it’s an exciting vision for the future, a happier, more satisfied future all around. I can easily envision these pleasurable incentives as a way to make the world a better place, one sex toy at a time.

(from the archives)

The Delish Delores Deluxe Talks Body Confidence

KD: Welcome, Delores! It’s such a treat to have you back on A Hopeful Romantic, and discussing    such an exciting topic. Could you tell us what inspired you to begin a course on Body Confidence.

Delores Deluxe body confidencemini DDDD: I have been working on the cabaret and burlesque scene for nearly 10 years and have been teaching burlesque for about 5 years. I found during the regular burlesque classes that a lot of women felt unhappy or uncomfortable with their bodies and would often want to chat about this as part of the class. I felt that they were almost looking for permission to be open about their insecurities. I decided then I would create a new class with a focus on this and encouraging positive body image.

I’ve been sitting on this class for quite a while and haven’t really had time to follow it up but a change in my career situation recently has meant I’m now able to put all my energy into it, which is really exciting and challenging.

KD: What do you see as the main cause for women’s over-all lack of body confidence?

DD: I think there are many causes – I’m sure that many people have long-term deep-seated issues with their bodies that a couple of hours in a workshop won’t be able to address – I am not a psychologist! On a more general level, I do think the media has set a very unrealistic ‘body ideal’ for most women with their airbrushed and enhanced images on every magazine.

While I can understand that fashion magazines do, and have done this for years, my real issue is with the newer celebrity magazines where we see women berated on the front cover for having lost or gained weight, wearing unflattering clothes or nipping out without make-up. This sets a really dangerous example and puts enormous pressure on all women, particularly younger girls who feel they have to look a certain way to be accepted.

KD: Do you think women’s attitudes toward their bodies are getting better or worse with all of the interconnectedness of the internet and social media?

DD: I think the internet can have a positive influence in that it encourages discussion and can offer a wonderful support network, however,  it does give EVERYONE a voice and opinion and some of these can be deeply damaging and negative. I think the benefits outweigh the cons though – just keep away from the nasties!

KD: Could you tell us a bit about your own journey to body confidence, Delores.

DD: I trained and worked as an actor for many years before I moved into cabaret. I suspect anyone who has trained in a professional performing arts establishment and worked in that industry will at some point have felt pressure about their body and image, especially in dance and musical theatre. I powered through but being told  outright you’re too tall, too big or not pretty enough for something does have an effect regardless of the training you go through to deal with personal rejection. Moving into burlesque made a huge difference to my self-confidence and I finally felt that I was being judged on my performance abilities and skills rather than ‘looking Delores Deluxe Body confidenceTop hat DDright for a part’. Also the style element was something that I got right into immediately! I loved the clothes and the lingerie and it really helped me find my individual style, sourcing items for which,  is now one of my greatest passions and pleasures!

KD: What do you think is most detrimental to our body confidence?

DD: I think there many factors and everyone might feel differently. Some people have had negative influences in their early years, which are very hard to shake and reprogramme. Other people judge themselves too harshly and are constantly comparing themselves to others, which I think is really pointless. We are all unique and individual and need to try to focus on the positive rather than what we feel we are lacking.

KD: Why do you suppose body confidence issues are much more common among women than men? Why are men more comfortable in their bodies, no matter what they look like?

DD: I don’t think that’s true….. I think they are maybe just less vocal about it!

KD: Pop culture, airbrush mag covers and cosmetic surgery readily available for a price can take their toll on any woman’s body confidence. How can we combat that influence when we’re surrounded by it every day?

DD: We need to look at reality – what do you actually find attractive? There are so many beautiful women who don’t conform to standard or media ideals who look amazing. Being body shape aware and understanding how to dress for your body shape can make you feel like a million dollars!

I think surgery is a different issue – if someone is really unhappy and wants to change themselves with plastic surgery then they should feel free to do so for themselves but not because they feel they are expected to look a certain way.

KD: In the burlesque performances I’ve seen, I notice that there are women of all body sizes and shapes, and the confidence and sensuality all of these women exude on stage is amazing. Why, and how, does burlesque helps build body confidence?

DD: Burlesque is a feminine art form and, in its resurgence, is predominantly run by women which gives us control over what we create and what we want to see. Creating a routine and a character is a very personal thing and a great deal of ourselves and personalities go into it, which Delores Deluxe body confidenceKittens.8makes each performer unique. I believe that once we stop comparing ourselves to others then we can really begin to feel happier, more comfortable and positive in our own skins.

The classic burlesque style is also very flattering to all body shapes – the corsets which come in all styles, sizes and shapes mould perfectly to the individual body and enhance curves (if you have them) or create them (if you don’t) Hours of work and hundreds of pounds go into costuming so they have to make you feel amazing and ready to va va voom!

KD: How much does our attitude toward our bodies influence the other areas of our lives?

DD: I think any negativity can have a massive impact on our happiness and self-esteem, which then can influence the way we see ourselves and how we set our ambitions and our expectations. If we don’t treat ourselves with respect then it’s very easy to let this affect our careers, relationship and personal goals.

KD: If you could give one piece of advice to help women be more comfortable in their own skin, what would it be?

DD: Come to my class!!! Ha ha! Just give yourselves a break, girls! Focus on the things you do like and remember there is so much more to attractiveness than having your ideal body or perfect face. I also advocate surrounding yourself with a crack team of amazing friends – good for keeping body and soul together in times of trouble!

KD: Tell us a bit about the Body Confidence classes. When are they available? Where? Who can participate? How can we sign up?

DD: The class is a 90 minute workshop – it’s very nurturing, gentle and quite good fun! We’ll be focussing on looking at our bodies in a positive light and challenging the issues that hold us back from feeling like the goddesses we are!

The classes are every Saturday in Angel at:

The Joker of Penton Street

58 Penton Street

N1 9PZ

Class times are 11am 1pm and 3pm

£25pp

http://www.thekittenclub.com/dates-prices/classes/

About Delores Deluxe

Delores Deluxe body confidenceMini DD2

Delores Deluxe started out her cabaret career under a railway arch in Bermondsey in 2005 in the original line up of The Kitten Club. She is an established performer, programmer and promoter on the London burlesque and cabaret scene as well as founder and leader of London’s longest running troupe, The Kitten Club Cabaret which have been performing around London for 9 years. Having a 10 year background in classical acting and musical theatre, she was delighted to stumble into the emerging burlesque scene in London in 2005 and to put her skills to an exciting new use. Delores is also now enjoying working as a soloist on the cabaret and variety circuit with her comedy magic tricks and can generally be found wearing something polka dot!

www.thekittenclub.com
Twitter: @deloresdeluxe
Facebook: 
https://www.facebook.com/thekittenclub

 

Renee Rose Talks Sex Magic in Avalon

One of the very best things about Eroticon is meeting new people, and one of those people I had the pleasure of meeting was the lovely and spankalicious Renee Rose, and I’m totally delighted to have her on A Hopeful Romantic today! Welcome Renee Rose! 

Renee Rose held for ransom10002819_421069491372812_32935404_nI had the immense pleasure of attending KD Grace’s workshop at Eroticon on Spirituality and Sex. The topic is one that has always intrigued me. I believe there is power and magic in sex and it can be as sacred an act as giving birth or transitioning to death.

In my new Avalon romance, a sex rite eventually brings the hero and heroine together, but the beginning of the relationship is full of tension. Ariana, a priestess of Avalon is kidnapped and held for ransom by a mercenary knight who seeks the release of his clan members from her brother’s dungeon. Keeping two characters cooped up in a small room together for a week (particularly when one character is tied up the entire time) gives a kinky author all kinds of opportunities for forced intimacies and deserved punishments.  Here’s a little snippet of their banter:

They were not taught to send curses at Avalon. She had been raised to bless, to elevate spirits, to bring harmony and peace. Yet, she knew the elders understood magic well enough to send evil, too. If she could send love to heal, she could also send hatred to harm.

After some concentrated effort, her captor’s eye began to twitch and a sweat broke out on his forehead.

“Lift your curse, highness.”

Her lips curved into a satisfied smile. She did not know what he felt, but it seemed her darkness had an effect. “What curse?” she asked innocently.

“Lift it.”

“Or what?”

“Please.”

She expected a threat, rather than supplication and his appeal unsteadied her. In truth, she feared the power coursing through her. It had an unfamiliar, dense darkness and her naval center felt heavy and sick.

“Do you tell me you do not deserve it?”

He rubbed one temple as if she had given him a headache. “Aye. I deserve it. Yet it does not serve either of us. Do you wish to be guarded by a wounded dog? I am far meaner when I am in pain.”

Blurb:

When Sir Gorran’s people disappear after a raid on a Saxon settlement, he kidnaps Princess Ariana, a priestess of Avalon, and demands their return. Though he knew he risked Ariana’s curse as well as a lifetime hiding from the king’s sword, he does not realize his greatest risk in holding the lovely princess for ransom is to his heart.

The intimacy shared with her kidnapper leaves Ariana wounded by the experience and his reappearance at the annual tournament only deepens her pain. When her brother foists him on her as a guardian and slave she must come to terms with her feelings for the dominant warrior. Will she send him away to his death, or will she realize her pain is only caused by living without him?

Renee Rose Spanking Romance10003387_421069588039469_1490927064_nPublisher’s Note: This book contains spanking, anal punishment and erotic sex scenes.

Buy Now on Amazon, Amazon UK, Barnes & Noble, ARe

Renee Rose is a modern dance teacher, Feldenkrais Practitioner(R), energy worker and kinkster. Named Eroticon USA’s Next Top Erotic Author in 2013, her books are all centered around her favorite kink: spanking.  She can be found on:

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Do you know when I first started loving you? Demelza Hart Explores the Question

Thank you so much, KD for once again hosting me at you blog.

Demelza HartSatedSomeone once said that a man grows to love the person he is attracted to and a woman becomes attracted to the person she loves.

It’s all bollocks, of course, but in many ways this explains Tara and Patrick’s relationship in my trilogy, Suited to You.

Neither of them is looking for love at first, but perhaps they conform to the stereotype after all.

I love that moment in The Sound of Music when the Captain and Maria reveal when they first fell in love with the other. Touchingly and interestingly, for both, it’s very early on in their acquaintance, almost immediately in fact, with little incidents that reveal something personal and intimate about them. Is it always that way?

In Suited to You, Tara doesn’t believe herself to be in love with Patrick. She wants sex, she’s come looking for sex and, on the surface, she seems to conform more to the male stereotype – slowly falling in love with the person she’s attracted to. But perhaps she’s fallen far earlier than that?

Like the dominant hero in so many erotic romances, it’s not what we know about him but what we don’t know about him that renders him irresistible. The very things which are supposed to keep Patrick – The Suit – emotionally distanced from Tara in fact make her fall for him. His anonymity, his aloofness, his control – in his mind, and hers, these are designed to keep the feelings at arms’ length, but in actuality they compel her to him, not only physically but emotionally. Tara is hooked even before the overwhelming physical attraction takes hold.

As for Patrick? Well, despite all the moody, enigmatic brooding, he’s a bloke, after all – more predictable, perhaps. Does he fulfil the male paradigm and eventually fall in love with Tara? You’ll have to read the series to find out.

Here’s a taste from the final part, Sated:

‘Shit! I’m bloody supposed to be at work!’

Demelza Hart9781783751266_FCAs the thin dawn light crept into the room behind the heavy velvet curtains, I tore myself awake with a panic.

Patrick rolled over and placed an arm over me before I could escape.

‘No, you’re not. It’s sorted, don’t worry. No one expects you to get from Devon to Dean Street in two hours.’

‘But Sarah’s not even my boss any more! What if the new editor’s there today?’

‘Relax,’ he said with a chuckle. ‘She’s not starting until next week. Technically, as assistant editor, you’re the boss, and you’ve just given yourself the day off.’

‘Have I?’ He was kissing over my body, which once again awakened instantly. He’d already reached my collar bone.

‘Hm-mm. Or at least … you’re working from home.’

Left nipple.

‘On what?’

Right nipple.

‘Research.’

Belly button.

‘For?’

Left hip.

‘Mating rituals in the West Country.’

Right hip.

Demelza HartExposed properI tittered. ‘Oo-arr, moy darlin’ – does that mean spreading me all over in clotted cream and licking it off?’

Clit. Oh, definitely my clit.

I moaned and arched. He broke off and glanced up.

‘Among other things. Plenty of time to explore that –’ he spun me over and yanked me up onto my knees ‘– and more.’ And he thrust into me, hard and long, right up in one go.

Demelza Hart loves both contemporary and historical erotica and erotic romance. Suited to You, published by Xcite Books, follows the exhibitionist, spontaneous sexual encounters of Tara and her lover, Patrick, otherwise known as The Suit, and is her first trilogy. Her stories can be found in all the usual places, but please join Demelza on Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/demelza.hart.3

Twitter – https://twitter.com/DemelzaHart

or her blog – http://demelzahart.wordpress.com/

Buy the Suited to You Trilogy Here:

Spontaneous 

Amazon.co.uk

Amazon.com

Exposed

Amazon.co.uk

Amazon.com

Sated

Amazon.co.uk

Amazon.com

 

I’m Taking Over at The SubClubbers FaceBook Page!

SubClub FB pate takeover imageI’m very excited to have been asked by Nina and the fabulous folks over at The SubClub to do a takeover of their yummy FaceBook page this Tuesday, 18th March. If you’re in the US, I’ll be taking the reins at 7:00 pm Eastern Time.  That means for my UK friends, slumber party time! I’ll be settling in with choccie a glass of wine and my warm jammies … er, I mean my corset and satin robe (Oh stop laughing already!)

I hope you’ll join me and all the lovelies at SubClub and ask me questions and tell me naughty things, because I’ll be doing the same to you.

You can find me here all ready to chat At 7:00 Eastern Time. https://www.facebook.com/subclubbers I’ll be ready to talk writing, reading, and sexy stuff, and I hope you will too! See you at the SubClub!