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Surrogates is FREE in the UK! Sizzling Garden Porn Just in Time for Summer

surrogatesTis the season for …. You guessed it! Garden Porn! And what could possibly be better than a FREE smutty romp in a steamy garden! I’m very excited to announce that my petite novel, Surrogates, is now FREE on Amazon UK! Not yet on Amazon US, but hopefully VERY soon! Now’s your chance to appreciate a very hot UK summer with Francie, Simon and Dan as they have their voyeuristic, masturbatory, naughty, unusual threesome all around the gorgeous grounds and gardens of Dan’s palatial estate.

While I’m spending my time in the veg beds, you can curl up with a cool drink and a raunchy read as you find out why Francie has way more fun in her veg patch than even a picnic in the allotment will allow. It’s sex al fresco with lots of sexy, sizzling, twists and turns. To whet your appetite for a little filthy fun in the garden, here’s an excerpt along with links. US folks, I’m doing my best to see why the delay for you, but will shout it out loudly when Surrogates goes free for you too!

Blurb:

DANIEL ALEXANDER III takes his marriage vows seriously. Until he gets the balls to ask his wife, BEL, for a divorce, watching each other masturbate is all he can offer his beautiful gardener, FRANCIE CARTER. But when Dan’s friend, SIMON PARIS, agrees to be his surrogate, affairs of the heart get complicated.

Excerpt

Dan groaned. ‘It’s all such a mess. I wasn’t lying when I said Francie’s not my mistress. Well she’s not my mistress in a physical sense. I’m faithful to my wife. We, Francie and I, only ever masturbate together.’

Simon couldn’t hold back a snort of laughter, but the look Dan shot back stopped him mid-guffaw.

‘I know what you think, and I know how utterly ridiculous that sounds, but I swear to you it’s true. I’m crazy about the woman, but I pledged my trough to Bel.

‘You what?’

‘I made a promise, and I’ll not break it. I’ll stay faithful to Bel until I get the balls to ask her for a divorce. I’ll not be like my father was.’

Simon studied Dan for a minute as they walked. ‘And Francie’s OK with this.’

‘Of course she’s not OK with it. That’s the problem.’

‘Then, just ask Bel for a divorce,’ Simon said.

‘Oh I will, I will. It’s just now’s a difficult time. I’ve got so much on my mind. And Bel’s going through some difficult times too, and I just can’t do it right Villa d'este 2imagesnow. It wouldn’t be right.’ He chuckled softly and shot Simon a sideways glance. ‘Remember at Tivoli, when you caught me with Gabriella, and we asked you to join us.’

Simon smiled. ‘It’s like deja vu all over again, only you two weren’t exactly having a wank, as I recall. One of the regrets of my youth, not joining your little party. Had a few good wanks thinking about it though.’

It took Simon a second to realize Dan had stopped walking. He stood in knee high grass, his brow drawn tight in deep concentration.

‘Maybe this time we need to turn the tables.’ Dan stroked his chin thoughtfully. ‘You know, alter the equation just slightly.’

Dan began to walk again, slowly. ‘What if Francie and I invited you to join us?’

‘What?’

‘Only this time I’d be the one having a wank. Oh I’d be telling you what to do to her and all, or she’d be asking you, but think about it, Simon, how she must feel. She knows I still have sex with Bel. Granted, not very often, but I do my husbandly duty when she asks me.’

‘Your husbandly duty. Right.’

‘My point is that I get at least some sex because Bel is my wife, and I’m faithful to her. But poor Francie’s faithful to me. She doesn’t get anything but a wank, and she has to provide that for herself. I can’t even touch her, Simon, because I’m afraid once I do I won’t be able to stop myself. But if you, as my old and trusted friend, were to make love to her for me, you know be my surrogate, then Francie could get some satisfaction too, and maybe…’

‘You want me to fuck your mistress for you?’

Get Surrogates FREE Now

Amazon UK

Reviews

“Full of quirky characters, kinky sex, unusual settings and clever writing, Surrogates is definitely an erotic romance novella I’d recommend if you’re looking for something a little different.” Erotica For All

*****

“This was an exciting and sexy read at the turn of every page, with a storyline that was so original it was brilliant. If you want a fun, fast read with great character flow and connection and hot sex on almost every page this is for you.” Midnight Boudoir

*****

“Surrogates is the perfect novel for any erotica reader out there… hot, sexy, sensual… it definitely defines erotica it in it’s own right. K.D Grace is one amazing author whose novels simply should be devoured!” A Redheads Guilty Reads

*****
“There are plenty of hot hot sex scenes and a case of mistaken identity and misunderstandings. It is a fun and quick read. Overall, very well written. The characters come alive on the pages and they feel real. I recommend it to anyone who likes short, erotic tales and who aren’t put off by some f/f action and threesomes.” Hearts on Fire Reviews

*****

“Surrogates is full of tongue in cheek comedy, and has just the right amount of erotica to fill readers minds with accounts of how both Daniel and Bel get their orgasms. This is a voyeur’s version of heaven.” 5 out of 5, Love Romance Passion

 

 

The Pet Shop: Free GIFT Again!

If you missed out the last time around, not to worry, because I’m very pleased to announce that Xcite are once again offering a free taste of my critically acclaimed novel, The Pet Shop! The first part of the limited edition Kindle  trilogy, The Gift is available FREE for the next five days on Amazon beginning Wednesday 20th March.  Xcite are very aware of just how addicting Pets can be, Part Two, The Secret Life of Pets, and Part Three, The Taming, are just £.77 each in the UK and $1.19 in the US. The only thing better than a naughty Pet of your very own is a FREE naughty Pet of your very own.  If you want your Pets in an all-at-once, rough and tumble, you can still get the whole package of lusty, kinky Pet fun with the original.

The Gift Blurb:

In appreciation for a job well done, Stella James’s boss sends her a Pet – a human Pet. The mysterious Tino arrives equipped with a collar a leash and an erection, and Stella quickly learns that keeping Pets, especially this one, is extremely addictive. Will a chance meeting with reclusive philanthropist, Vincent Evanston, who looks an awful lot like Tino, but couldn’t be more different, double Stella’s pleasure or just be double trouble?

About The Pet Shop

The Pet Shop is a modern retelling of Beauty and the Beast. In part, the theme of the story is our effort to understand the beast that lives within all of us, to tame it and make it acceptable to polite company. Of course in the taming of anything wild we run the risk of losing that wildness that compelled us to love it in the first place. The Pet Shop explores the effort to find a balance between the two.

I’ve always been fascinated with our animal nature, and I’ve often wondered how much of that nature is ancestral behaviours reasserting themselves and how much of it – especially from the standpoint of the human pet situation I’ve created in The Pet Shop, is simply a need to be loved and adored, and to be able to trust someone enough to give up control to them.

Beauty and the Beast and my retelling of it in The Pet Shop are both about seeing the true nature of a person, with all their flaws and neuroses, and loving them anyway. But ultimately the story is also about trusting enough to allow oneself to be loved, and believing that one is worthy of love, warts, blemishes and all.

Excerpt:

‘I’m sorry, Tino,’ Stella shoved to her feet, tearing her gaze away from the gorgeously horny man sitting on the floor by her chair. ‘But I just can’t do this. If I had known what Anne – what Strigida – had planned for me, I would have never consented, surely Anne knew that. Anyway, I feel really bad that I’ve wasted your time, but this is just not something I can do.’

The pet only looked up at her with adoring and expectant eyes.

‘I’ll gladly give you taxi fare home, of course. I mean that’s the least I can do. None of this is your fault, after all. Anne told me that you were a gift, so I assume you’ve already been paid.’ She raced through the last sentence breathlessly, her face burning at the very thought that the company had paid for a prostitute for her.

Did they really think she was that desperate? And never mind how desperate she was, surely she had worked at Strigida long enough for them to realise this was not the gift for her. And she was bloody well certain Anne knew that. There would definitely be words when she returned from Bath. ‘Is that all right, if we do that? If we just call it even and I get you a cab home?’

Tino made no response. Instead, he rubbed his cheek affectionately against her leg and moved to sit back on his haunches, a position that made his erection look even more enormous, bulging heavily against his thigh. At the sight, her stomach muscles tensed low and tight and her pussy clenched and half convulsed.

‘I forgot,’ she looked down at the manual still gripped in one hand, ‘Pets don’t talk. But since I really don’t want a Pet, couldn’t you break the rules just this once?’

He brushed her leg again with his cheek, then with his lips, making delicious shivers run up her spine.

‘Guess not. OK. Well, I realise this is an awkward situation, Tino, and I’m really sorry about that. I know you’re expected to stay here. I appreciate your position. Really I do. I’m sure we’ll get through this if we work together.’ She nodded down the hall. ‘I have a guestroom. You’re welcome to sleep there. It’s small but comfortable.’ He followed her on silent feet, and looked on as she showed him the guestroom.

‘The closet’s there.’ She pointed. ‘Though I guess you won’t need that. Extra toiletries are on the dressing table there. Those you might need. And the remote for the telly, well it’s a little tetchy. Here let me show you.’ Suddenly she realised he wasn’t paying any attention. His gaze was locked on her – more specifically on her crotch. She blushed hard and forced a smile. ‘Never mind. I imagine you can figure it out if you decide you want to watch telly. Anyway, make yourself at home. Are you hungry? Can I get you something to drink?’

Again, he plopped down on the floor. This time he wrapped his arms around her leg and began to rub his cheek against her thigh.

‘Tino, really. I don’t think I can …’

He made little grunting sounds and shifted his hips forward and back. If anything, his erection seemed still bigger. She suddenly remembered the manual said the Pet Shop kept their Pets horny. Hadn’t Anne said he usually didn’t have to wait this long before he came?

She found herself blushing again at the sight of his heavy hard-on. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t think about how … uncomfortable you must be. I know you’re not allowed to touch yourself unless your keeper gives you permission, and, well, since we can’t, since we’re not going to …’ She nodded to his cock. ‘It’s all right with me if you do what you need to do. You know, for some relief.’ She felt like her face would burst into flames.

For a long moment he looked up at her with his bottomless cinnamon eyes, as though he couldn’t quite comprehend what she wanted of him. Then, slowly, carefully, holding her gaze, he laid a hand against his cock and ran a curled palm up the length of it. A shudder ascended his spine. He threw back his head and released a trembling breath that ended in a deep animal groan at the back of his throat.

Almost before she realised it, she replied with a little whimper of her own that slipped between her lips. Her nipples pearled through the thin silk of her blouse, and her pussy felt slick and giddy. She closed her eyes only for a split second, but the next thing she knew, Tino was standing beside her, so close that her hand, resting low against her belly brushed his cock, and they both gasped at the feel of it. Before she could do more than marvel at the velvety softness that felt like it sheathed granite, he pushed in closer, and his large hand engulfed hers easing it gently against his cock with just enough pressure to encourage her fingers to wrap around the girth of him.

She should have stepped back, she should have commanded him to stay in the room and do what he needed to do and not come out until he was done. But she didn’t. Instead she curled her fingers around him and felt his hand tighten over hers. She expected him to hump like a dog, but he only stepped closer, engulfing her in a feral scent not unlike cat fur on a sunny day.

The shifting of his hips was almost invisible but for the tensing of the muscles low in his hard belly, tightening and lifting until his soft pubic curls just grazed the inside of her wrist. Instead of the blatant sexuality she expected, he simply laid his head on her shoulder, his warm breath raising the fine hair along the back of her neck. His heart hammered a heavy drumbeat that matched her own, and her nipples seemed to be pressing ever forward to get nearer to it.

His free arm encircled her, resting just above her hip, where his hand moved in a gentle caress up and down her ribs, almost tickling. The sensation of it all accumulated warm and heavy just below her belly. The heat of his lips rested close to the pulse of her neck. They were slightly parted, his breath coming in fast little puffs.

She knew she should be pushing him away, making him bend over for the spanking a misbehaving Pet deserved. She hadn’t asked him to touch her, and she hadn’t volunteered her services. ‘You’re a very naughty Pet, Tino.’ She barely managed to gasp before he tensed, and a strangled groan escaped his throat just as his cock twitched and she felt the silky slick heat of his come spill over both of their hands and against his bare belly. Then his whole body convulsed, and involuntarily he pulled her tight against him, an act which sent her into her own convulsions. She let out a startled cry. She hadn’t expected to come. She hadn’t intended to come, and yet there she stood quivering out her pleasure against the Pet, who held her in a powerful, sex-stimulated bear-hug.

From Amazon.com

The Gift

The Secret Life of Pets

The Taming

From Amazon.co.uk

The Gift

The Secret Life of Pets

The Taming

 

 

Kyoko Church’s Mad and Sexy Inspiration For Her Pleasure

version1Hello KD! Thank you once again for welcoming me to your blog today. A pleasure, as always.

Today I wanted to talk about a source of inspiration for my new book, For Her Pleasure.  Namely the TV show, Mad Men. If you like well written HBO (or I guess technically AMC) dramas this, in my opinion, is one of their best. It’s so well done, the plots are hugely engrossing, the characters are superbly flawed and beautifully three dimensional, I really can’t say enough about how much I love this series. Because of my travels and my intermittent access to pay channels, I’ve only just started season five so if you know what happens, don’t tell me!! But while I was just starting to write for HarperCollins Mischief Books, I was firmly entrenched in season four. And while very much lusting after Don Draper  – seriously,  don’t get me started, this post is not about that! – even this mostly heterosexual girl could not help but be seduced by the fiery sexuality that is Joan Holloway.

First of all, one only has to take a quick glimpse at actress Christina Hendricks to know that there is something amazingly sexual about her. I love that she is so voluptuous, buxom, bursting with sensuality. And the way they dress her on the show is perfection. They do everything to highlight all her curves and proportions in the sexiest way imaginable. I mean, I’m not a guy but even I cannot help but think…WOW! Just… wow.

Pair that with the personality they give her:  assured, haughty, unrelenting, take no prisoners. She always seems like she’s one step ahead, and Kyoko For her pleasureimagesgiggling about it too. She can cut anyone, man or woman, to the quick with just one glance. And speaking of glances, she can make a barbed comment and then look at the person, so innocently when they both know full well she knows exactly what she’s saying and just how accurate and close to the bone it is. And she does it all while appearing to be sympathizing with the person. It’s so bitchy! Awesomely, awesomely bitchy. Check this out, to have a small glimpse at what I mean. I was inspired, to say the least.

Here’s the thing. By and large, little girls are taught to “be nice.” I certainly was! And truth be told, I like being nice! Even teasing, however good natured, can sometimes make me really uncomfortable since, as everyone knows, what makes a good tease is always that there has to be some element of truth to it. So, generally speaking, in my day to day life I walk around enjoying being nice. Not to be too Pollyanna about it but I believe the old adage that what goes around comes around. Plus I think being a nice person is just an enjoyable way to live your life.

But.

Something happened to me when I started to delve into the idea of Joan’s character being in a BDSM relationship. I started asking myself questions like, what if she were a Domme… what if she were with a man who got off on humiliation… what would their relationship look like? I felt a new voice creep inside me. One day, I sat down at my laptop and within ten minutes I wrote this email from my perspective Mistress to her perspective sub…

Kyoko ChurchFor Her PleasureFrom: Mistress

To: SubPaul

Subject: For Your Drive

Hi! This email is for your drive home. If you have opened it before then, stop, close this up. Open it back up when you are about to drive home. Put it away. Now.

Okay. Are you alone now? Good boy. Have you been thinking about me? Of course you have. You’re always thinking about me, aren’t you? I’ve taken up residence in that naughty little brain of yours.

I have to address the fact that your wife doesn’t go down on you. Have you wondered why I haven’t commented on that in our emails? Did you think I hadn’t noticed or maybe it wasn’t important to me? Oh no. No, no, no. I took very keen notice of that. I have thought about that. A LOT. Because here’s something you should know about me. I LOVE to suck cock. I fucking love it. The power. I really get off on the power of it. I know that if I had my lips and tongue anywhere near your cock right now I would have complete control over you. Total.

So, Mr. I-haven’t-had-a-blowjob-in-20-years, when I get my hands on you again I’m going to strip you down, sit you on a chair, cuff your hands behind your back and start licking. That spot. You know that spot? Oh yes, the one just under your head, that sensitive spot that you told me you couldn’t touch because it gets you there too quickly? Aw, poor baby. Too fucking bad. I like that spot. I would flick and tongue and kiss and suck that spot until you were a pleading, begging, weeping, sopping fucking mess. Don’t you dare cum in my face. I mean, Mistress loves cum, but I don’t want it yet. You fucking hold it back, slut.

Now. Put your phone away. Start your car. And think about this email the whole way home. Try subtly to get wifey to fuck you tonight. Report back to me in the morning.

Kisses!

*****

I wrote that email in one fell swoop and – I’ve never tried hard core drugs before but – I imagine the rush I got from writing it might be akin to that sort of high. It was one of those moments you hear artists talk about when they create something that seems to come from outside of themselves and they think… Where the hell did that come from? I certainly had that feeling. I wrote it and thought… Who the fuck was that??

That email became the basis for a short story, Something Twisted This Way Comes, which appeared in Mischief’s My Secret Life anthology. One more short story later and I was certain I wasn’t done with these characters. I knew I wanted to devote a whole book to them. I was having so much fun being Mistress!

So that was the genesis of For Her Pleasure. I hope you’ve enjoyed hearing about it. I certainly enjoyed telling the story. And if you found it intriguing, I hope you’ll check out the book too!

Blurb:

Imagine an average guy with a wife, a job, average house, average car, average sex life… Well, not exactly. He has a secret he finds so embarrassing that he never talks to anyone about it. And then one day he meets her…

An architect chairs the newly formed Sexual Harassment in the Workplace Committee. When the consultant he hires to help him organize the new committee turns out to be a red haired bombshell, he tries to rein in his untoward thoughts.

But when she uncovers his embarrassing little secrets, this married man ends up in a relationship that’s so wrong on every level of his carefully put together life.

How long will he let his burning carnal desires threaten everything he’s worked so hard for?

Buy Links:

Amazon

Amazon UK

Barnes and Noble

Google Play

Kobo Books

About Kyoko Church:

Kyoko Church discovered the power of the written erotic word when she was 16 years old and penned a very explicit missive to her boyfriend detailing all the naughty things she wanted to do to him. When he received it, boyfriend was impressed. When he found it, father was not.

For the next 18 years she hid her naughty thoughts in shame. Until she found a community where they were once again appreciated for the well-imagined smut they are. Her short stories have been published in anthologies by Black Lace, Rubicund Publishing and Xcite Books. Book One, Nymphomania, and Book Two, Sapphic Secrets, in her Draper Estate Trilogy were published by Xcite in 2012. For Her Pleasure was published by HarperCollins Mischief in February 2013.

A Canuck by birth, she has recently made Australia her home. She is currently learning to drive on the left and say G’day convincingly.

Find Kyoko here:

Website: kyokochurch.blogspot.com

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/kyoko.church

Twitter: https://twitter.com/kyokochurch

Pinterest: http://pinterest.com/kyokochurch/

 

 

 

 

 

Kinky Boots Go Walking on a Sexy Blog Tour

Kinky_BootsWho doesn’t love a good pair of boots? A good pair of boots can make you feel sexy and powerful, like you’re ready to conquer the whole world. And if a good pair of boot is nice, a kinky pair of boots is even better. Beginning Monday 18 March, I’ll be taking Kinky Boots on tour. For a week I’ll be parading Jill and Finn and Eleanor and Meinrad and their naughty antics around to some of the hottest, naughtiest blog you could ever hope to visit. Here’s where the Kinky Boots gang will be. Come join us for the fun and frolic.

Find Kinky Boots on These Naughty Sites:

18th Marchhttp://sexyreads.co.uk
19th Marchhttp://dawnsreadingnook.blogspot.com/
20th Marchhttp://www.bookinitreviews.com/
21st Marchhttp://galestanley.blogspot.com
22nd Marchhttp://adrianakraft.com/blog
22nd Marchhttp://blissekiss.co.uk/ {Extra Snog Stop}

Blurb:

After a sizzling encounter in Kinky Boots, a quirky all-night shoe store, with the store’s hot owner, FINN MASTERS, JILL HART walks away in Kinky_Bootsthe most gorgeous boots ever. Her new boots come with an unexpected bonus, a sexy demon named ELEANOR, who’s looking for a good time. All she lacks is a body, and Jill’s will do nicely.

Jill quits her dead-end job and, not knowing what’s come over her stops by the nearest pub intent on doing tequila shots until she falls off the stool. Instead she does FINN MASTERS in the beer garden, unwittingly participating in her first ever threesome. The boots were the bait, the timing was right and Eleanor has new digs. It’s Finn job to prevent Eleanor’s misbehaving. His failure means he’ll have to ride shotgun and do damage control until Eleanor moves out at the next full moon.

With Eleanor in residence, Jill’s bolder, sexier, willing to take risks. But is she a whole new Jill, or is it just demon courage? And how will Finn feel about her when she’s just plain Jill again? Will the maddeningly magical ménage make Jill’s dreams come true, or will it break her heart?

Excerpt:

The clerk lifted her right foot into his hand. She tried to squirm away but he held her firmly flashing her a concerned glance from under a drawn brow. ‘You could have seriously injured your feet walking around Shoreditch at night in someone else’s shoes.’

The skirt she wore was a denim mini, and the way he sat between her legs made her feel exposed, vulnerable, and something a lot more yummy. As he ran his thumbs up her instep and over the pad of her foot, she shifted in the chair sliding down to accommodate his inspection.

‘Shoes are so important. They protect our feet, our soles, the only part of us that regularly contacts the earth. They allow us that intimate connection with our planet while at the same time keeping us safe from it.’ He continued his inspection of her feet, hands moving gently over her arch to the ball then to her toes as he cupped her heel in a warm hand. ‘No two people’s soles contact the earth in the same way.’

Her pulse thudded at the enthusiasm of his little speech which, along with his gentle inspection of her feet, felt shockingly intimate, even more so than if he had actually peeked up her skirt. His actions were having a cumulative effect low between her hip bones. ‘Maybe you could sell me something a little more suited to me.’ Her words rushed out breathless and unsteady.

He placed both hands on his thighs and looked up at her. ‘Did you have a pair in mind?’

She gave a quick glance around the store, and her eyes lit on a pair of mauve boots that came up just over the ankle, low on the calf. They sported delicate kitten heels and were threaded with sage green laces that looked more like ribbons, ‘How about those,’ she said. Then she blushed fiercely. They were lovely, elegant, and any idiot could see, totally not suited for someone like her. ‘Or maybe something a little more practical.’ She avoided his gaze. ‘A little less flashy.’

Ignoring her second thoughts, he stood and walked to the rack. She couldn’t keep from noticing how nicely his butt filled out his jeans. She could imagine that arse had sold more than a few pairs of shoes to women who liked a good view. It was then she realized he had taken the boots straight off the display. ‘I’m hard to fit,’ she said as he knelt in front of her and unlaced one boot.

‘Trust me–’ he smiled up at her, opened the boot and offered it to her like Cinderella’s Prince Charming ‘– I can fit you just fine.’

 

 

Lily Harlem Cofesses All About Her Naughty Night Nurse

version1

I’m very pleased to welcome my launch mate, Lily Harlem, to A Hopeful Romantic today. We had the pleasure of launching our petite novels for Mischief Books on the same day. Naughty Night Nurse and Kinky Boots are mates in naughtiness, so to speak, and I’m very happy to be in such exquisite company. Welcome Lily, do tell!

Thank you so much for inviting me and my naughty nurse over to play today, KD, so very kind of you, though be warned, she’s a bit of a handful as you can tell by that jaunty jut of her hip and the way her uniform is just a little bit too tight!

I’ve always had a nurse story bubbling away at the back of my mind. I trained as a nurse when I was 18 and then worked in London for many years. The hours were long and hard, the work certainly stressful, but it was also incredibly rewarding. Helping patients was part of the job and I thrived on the adrenaline-inducing department I specialized in – Accident and Emergency. This was my home, be it during the day or on the night shift. One of the things I adored most was the sense of teamwork between doctors, nurses, the porters, lab staff, radiographers and domestic workers (cleaners and kitchen staff). If everyone didn’t get on, communicate, work hard, then the place just couldn’t run. It was very rare to find a lazy staff member; that type of personality just didn’t survive! It was a case of working hard, then a bit harder, then if you had time, go play too. Mmm, yep, we played pretty hard if I remember correctly!

The hospital social club was an ancient building, tin roof and drink so cheap I was sure it was subsidized by someone – don’t know who. It was generally full, mostly people in a uniform of some description, or if not in uniform they still had tired faces and were most likely just out of scrubs after being in theatre all day. Mr Harlem and I had many a date at the ‘social’, in fact, I think we probably had our first date there!

During my nursing years I made many friends, most of them are memories now but a few have stood the test of time and without them still in my life there would be a great big hole. It does that to you, working in such an intense environment, you see people for who they are, beneath the layers. Those girlfriends have made up for me not having a sister and we’ve continued to rise and fall together on the crazy crests of life.  I adore them.

I’ve certainly called on hospital experiences and drawn on remembered characters during my last five years of full time writing, but none so much as Confessions of a Naughty Night Nurse.

Now don’t think this book is a memoir, it isn’t (OMG, if it was…!) but certainly the main character reminds me of someone I used to know, as do the two main doctors, Javier and Carl, though, of course, their personalities have been embellished considerably.  Some situations in the book are also reflections, and the descriptions of the hospital wards, corridors and Rose Cottage – that the fluffy name given to the morgue – are all exactly how I remember them.

Lily Harlem self publilybanner

I’ve just had a review for Confessions of a Naughty Night Nurse, and much to my delight it is written by a nurse…

It (Confessions of a Naughty Night Nurse) centers around Sharon, a night shift nurse in a hospital somewhere in England. If she lived in the U.S., she’d be called a float pool nurse because she can work almost anywhere in the hospital. You follow her sexscapades over the course of a few days/weeks and see how much trouble she gets into as well as how many people get between her legs. She’s naughty, remember?

This book had the potential for utter ridiculousness. As a nurse, I take my profession pretty seriously and I didn’t know if this book would make nurses look like trollops. It didn’t though. It felt real! The author’s grasp of medical lingo as well as the possible happenings in a hospital all felt right. I swear she mentioned Maslow and I guffawed. It appealed to the nurse and the instructor in me. The sex was good, but not overdone and I enjoyed the characters.

And my gosh, the book actually had a plot and a decent one at that. Plus, I was rooting for her to end up with the sexy doctor. Well done, Lily Harlem. You definitely won me over.

lily harlem night nursemaslowI don’t mind saying that I was pretty damn nervous when the reviewer reached the point were she said the words ‘utter ridiculousness’ and then stated that she was a nurse, but phew, thank goodness she went on to say it ‘felt’ real. That is exactly what I was trying to achieve, an amalgamation of two big parts of my life, my erotic romance writing and my nursing days – this lovely reviewer made me happy dance. Oh, and if you’re wondering what Maslow is, it’s a psychology model used for assessing needs, starting from the very basic, moving up through the need to achieve, be encouraged etc and finally reaching self-actualisation.

I hope if you do read Confessions of a Naughty Night Nurse, you enjoy Sharon’s naughty escapades. Here is the blurb and a sneaky excerpt taken from the beginning of the book.

Blurb:

When scalpels are set down, the ward lights turned off and the patients asleep, there is always time for mischief …

I guess you could call me a jack-of-all-trades nurse. I find work satisfaction in whichever department the hospital needs me most, as long as it’s through the darkest hours. Needless to say I’ve seen it all over the years, been there and done that, what’s left to shock me isn’t worth knowing. But it’s so often the quieter nighttime where the real high jinx abound.

Yes, the nocturnal life is the one for me. With a weakness for sexy guys wearing white coats and dangling stethoscopes, my fantasies are often realised and I’m adept at finding relief from the hospital grind in shadowy corners and cozy linen cupboards.

Of course my dedication to patient comfort is paramount. What kind of nurse would I be if it wasn’t? But when one act of extreme, albeit highly inappropriate, kindness forced me to become the hospital director’s snitch, the length I went to in order to keep my job, satisfied my desires and found me the love that had always evaded me. A love that made me push even my not-so-professional boundaries to the extreme.

Buy Confessions of a Naughty Night Nurse Here:

Amazon US $1.60  – http://www.amazon.com/Confessions-Naughty-Night-Nurse-ebook/dp/B00ALKUMDO/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1358408815&sr=1-1&keywords=confessions+of+a+naughty+night+nurse

Amazon UK  99p – http://www.amazon.co.uk/Confessions-Naughty-Night-Nurse-ebook/dp/B00ALKUMDO/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1358409386&sr=1-1

Kobo – http://www.kobobooks.com/ebook/Confessions-of-Naughty-Night-Nurse/book-cCHlzlkIyU23I5Gh_oCMFA/page1.html?s=cyqUFVT0e0O2NUFOibKLaQ&r=1

Barnes and Noble – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/confessions-of-a-naughty-night-nurse-lily-harlem/1113965701?ean=9780007513024

More buy links available on the Mischief website http://www.mischiefbooks.com/books/confessions-naughty-night-nurse/  – and Lily Harlem’s website – http://www.lilyharlem.com

Lily Harlem Confessions of a naughty night nurseimage001(1)Excerpt:

I checked my iPhone again. Another message from Tom.

 You coming?

I typed back quickly.

 Yes, so will you soon!

The porter appeared. He was new, a young guy, wide and stocky with hair so short you could see his scalp through it. He had the word love tattooed over the knuckles on his right hand.

‘You got one for Rose Cottage,’ he grunted, tugging the closed, coffin-style trolley along behind him.

‘Yes, sideward six.’

Luckily Mr Parslow’s skinny body was light, and within a few minutes we were heading out of the ward with him safely ensconced in the metal trolley.

‘Hey, Sharon,’ Tinkard called. ‘You may as well go for your break after you’ve done that, it’s just gone midnight.’

‘Right you are.’

The ward door shut with a heavy click and I put some muscle into pushing the trolley along the deserted corridor. As the pace picked up I stared at the lumpy back of the porter’s head and wondered if he was the one who’d found Javier and Iceberg.

If only I could see into his mind.

I pondered on whether I should question him. Just come straight out and ask if he’d seen the hottest medical senior house officer since Pompeii’s hospital had got showered in ash, shagging the Wicked Witch of the West where the sun doesn’t shine.

I thought better of it. My asking alone could become gossip, and I was keen to avoid gossip that included myself. There were too many skeletons in my cupboard, and, for that matter, in clinical rooms, sluices, linen rooms, and in that handy, unused office at the back of the pharmacy. No, I would keep quiet and do my own investigating.

Stepping out into the night, I was whipped in the face by my hair, the band holding it in a low ponytail no match for the ferocity of the gale. I hunched my shoulders and stooped, trying to shelter my face from the needle-points of rain blasting my cheeks. The sound of the torrent of drips hitting the metal trolley was almost as loud as the wind creaking at the row of oaks leading to Rose Cottage. Their boughs strained and moaned, their leaves hissing in great waves of noise.

The porter sped up behind the back of the canteen and put considerable energy into pulling. By the time we went past the incinerator and turned the final corner, I found myself jogging along the uneven path.

Luckily Tom was waiting with the door to Rose Cottage held open.

We rushed in, the trolley banging over the door-bar and a scurry of leaves whirling around our feet.

‘Fucking hell,’ the porter said. ‘It’s cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey out there.’

Tom shut the door, winked at me, then took hold of my end of the trolley and wheeled it into the bay of body drawers. I trailed along behind, tucking my wind-wild hair back into its ponytail.

‘Yeah, good job the VIPs in here don’t care about shitty weather,’ Tom said, stopping at twenty-six C and then opening the trolley’s lid to reveal Mr Parslow’s covered body.

‘Bloody hate this part of the job, me,’ the porter said, staring at the shroud-covered lump and shuddering. ‘Don’t think I’ll ever get used to it.’

‘You go if you want,’ I said, ‘I’ll help here.’

He widened his eyes and took a step backwards. ‘Really?’

‘Sure, I’ve done it a million times. Doesn’t bother me.’

‘Bloody hell, thanks . . .’ He nibbled on his bottom lip and scanned my coat, as though searching for my name badge.

‘Sharon,’ I said. ‘Go, we’ve got this covered and I bet you’ve lots to do.’

‘Yeah, I have actually.’ He yanked his sleeves over his hands and strode back to the door.

Tom followed and I heard him lock it shut, as was standard procedure at Rose Cottage. The NHS couldn’t risk body snatching, that’s why Tom was employed as night security here.

‘Poor sod,’ Tom said, wandering back in. ‘Looked white as a sheet, didn’t he?’

‘They all do to start with.’

Tom pulled open the drawer and together we slid Mr Parslow onto the metal; his body, although light, was a dense weight. Tom then pushed the drawer shut and closed the door with a resounding slam.

He wrote Mr Parslow’s name on a piece of card and slipped it into a slot beneath.

‘So how long have you got?’ he asked, a naughty smile tugging his lips and his smoky-blue eyes twinkling.

I raised my eyebrows. ‘No time at all. Change of plan, I have to get straight back, sorry.’

‘Ah, Sharon,’ he said, frowning. ‘Why do you go and tease me like that? You know how much I look forward to your visits. They’re the only thing that keeps me going in this lifeless place.’

‘Sorry.’ I glanced down his body. Through his uniform – dark-navy trousers and shirt – Tom’s well-defined muscles could be made out, as could a fantastically long wedge of flesh behind his fly.

My pussy clenched as I remembered last week when I’d paid him a visit. He’d bent me over the desk and rammed himself into me for nearly an hour. It had been so damn hard to walk back onto the orthopaedic ward I’d actually considered nicking a pair of crutches.

I hitched in a breath, knowing I wouldn’t be able to keep up my pretence for more than another few seconds. Tom’s big dick and his skilful use of it was too damn irresistible. ‘The ward is crazy busy.’

He reached for me but I stepped away. ‘Just a kiss and a quick grope then, to keep me going.’

Quickly I moved even further away, towards the autopsy room. ‘Ha, ha,’ I said gleefully. ‘Just kidding, I’m on my break now.’

He flattened his lips into a tight line, as if holding back a broad smile, though at the same time narrowing his eyes as though furious with me. ‘You little minx,’ he said. ‘You’ll pay for that.’

‘Only if you can catch me.’ I darted into the autopsy room, dark except for a couple of low lights over a set of huge scales. The air was cool and laced with disinfectant.

I glanced around. There was a big, steel surgical table in the centre, a row of cupboards, several filing cabinets and a desk holding an ancient computer monitor.

‘Sharon,’ Tom called, the door shutting behind him with a soft whoosh. ‘You can’t escape.’

‘No, please, no,’ I said with a giggle and ran towards the far side of the room.

He chased but I dodged at the last minute, went to run for the door. He cut me off and I swivelled, found myself barging into the bolted-down table in the middle.

I gasped as the air flew from my lungs, but recovered quickly and, with my hands flat on the cool surface, scooted to the end.

Tom was facing me now, his face strewn with shadows, but I could see the thrill of the chase had flushed his cheeks and caused him to pant.

‘Come here,’ he said, edging closer.

‘No.’ I moved away from him in a circle around the table.

But it was futile; he was tall, fast and strong. Suddenly I was grabbed and tugged to the end, my body pulled up against his.

He pressed his lips down hard on mine and instantly the game was over. Now it was all about carnal satisfaction. With Tom, I was always guaranteed a spectacular orgasm and I couldn’t wait to start riding towards it.

‘Ah, yeah, baby, I’ve got you,’ he said, shoving my coat off and flicking it out of the way. ‘You gonna take it good again? Like you did last week?’

‘Yes,’ I panted, tearing at the buttons on his shirt. ‘Yes, that was so hot, I could hardly bloody walk the next day.’

He chuckled, low, deep and sexy, then kissed me again, the stubble on his chin scraping my skin and his breaths blowing hot and hard on my cheek.

He had my uniform up around my waist now and was forcing me to lie back on the ice-cold table. He stepped between my legs and leaned over me, pressing his groin into the gusset of my knickers.

‘Really, on here?’ I said, slotting my fingers into his hair and drawing my knees up so they pressed either side of his hips. ‘Where they chop up dead people? Isn’t that a bit freaky?’

‘The French for orgasm is petite mort so it’s kind of fitting.’ He was fiddling with the elastic of my underwear, at the juncture of my thighs.

‘Yeah, I suppose, but, oh –’ My words were cut off and turned into a delighted moan. He’d plunged two fingers high up inside me and found my clit with his thumb.

‘Oh, you’re such a dirty nurse,’ he murmured, kissing and licking over my cheek.

About Lily Harlem:

Lily Harlem is an award-winning author of contemporary erotic romance and lives in the UK with Mr Harlem and a host of rescued pets. Since giving up a career in nursing she loves to spend her days dreaming up naughty stories that have a happy ever afters. When you read her books be warned though, the bedroom door is always left wide open!

Lily Harlem links

Website http://www.lilyharlem.com/

Blog http://www.lilyharlem.blogspot.com/

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Goodreads http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4070110.Lily_Harlem

 

 

 

 

 
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